True Happiness =)

aw.. last night.. was looking through all the pics i took in sydney.. =) feels so nice.. so good.. ahhh.....
then like.. aw.. .. somehow just felt a lil different..
its like.. compare to about 10months ago.. i look so simple and happy. like a lil woman.. simple happy life.. i guess.. there're some stages we all have to go through huh>?
then now.. truly happy times are hard to come by..
ha.. i still feel so shy taking pics with sammy.. hm.. wait.. yea.. i think i would be XD when i see him again that is. lol.
think i;ll gushes or blush eh. lol.
o well...
but yea.. i guess those pics.. i never really realised i do look pretty.. its weird to say this.. but yea.. i think i do look kinda pretty when i lookey through pics taken with sammy together. like.. becos we;re together. .so the whole pic look nice and happy. happiness is what i'll called it. hahaha... .
uh huh... pics taken in the opening time.. shop not yet open.. in toy store.. sammy about to pluck his eyebrows off.. i mena trimmed.. then we took pic.. im sitting on his lap.. waslooking at it last night . like. .incredible feeling..
he was looking.. shy.. cam shy kinda. while i.. happy. pure joy...  yet my face saying i am comfortable and safe with him next to me. i find i look abit like him. i duno.. smile perhaps? maybe thats what they called .. erm.. couple face look? hahaha...
o well...
i just.. find it a .. lil.. hm.. sad? that i couldnt seem to feel nor look thta way as i did with him. i wish to go back..
thats the girl i want to be. thats who i am.
being a man's woman.
erm.. sounds wrong=.= lol. anyway yea..
hhm.... just.. yea.. he brings out the best in me. hte true beauty within me.. haiz.. i duno. i just don think i look the same.. nah.. rather. .feel the same when my pics are out..
it slike. somethings missing.. u will truly look happy. .when u're really with someone u love.
cute eh. ha.. o well. a lil difficult t o explain.. but yea. thats about i t..
makes no effect to smile..when he's around.... =)

gosh.. i hope tmr wont be so tired.... bro tok me and mum out to the uss night. my first time there. so explored a lil.. .it was alrite. but the fire works are spectacular.. wow....!!
throughout whole journey.. i kept thinking. .of how it would be liek if sammy is in sg.. i would take 2 days at sentosa to spend it with him. watch fireworks together..
day time will go coaster rides.. night can enjoy nightviews...
ahh.. .so nice....
hm....
still kinda worried about the hotel.. hopefully there'll still be space left.. and tickets.. weird. .i din know.. so fast ..even the price breaker alreayd sold out if im not worng. O.O this is like. .huh?? so fast>??
oh.. had dinner at 11.30pm/ am soo tired . omg. mum also eat late with us. no space to eat at uss..

oh.. whil waiting for fireworks to start, theres this kid.. i duno if hes' nuts, or.. yea.. i duno. its as though either he's u know.. thos etype of erm.. yea.. somethigns wrong with him. or becos he lack of discipline. he kept kicking me!! but its weird.. usually only when im very tired or not feeling right, i'll be rude unknowingly. like. .he kicked me.. i went 'oi!', ppl turned to look. i was like.. omg. what had i done? but it puzzles me.. i was feelign ok.. not so tired.. but.. yea.. i duno... it slike another me or sumtin.. anywya, he kicked and kiced. even kicked my mum!!!! how dare he!!! then this time i came to my senses. i dont care what ppl are thinking. i just rais emy voice.. gib him a hey!! or sumtin like that. i dun even care if ppl are watching. wth. kick real hard u know! somemore so big alreyad. still sit on stroller.. howvever.. i keep having this feeling that he's a.. u know. .those woodbridge kind of kid.. erm. .yea.. but anwayy,.. i don like ppl kicking my mum!
arhg... so rude.
then mukm have to end up at the back.. let them go front. sighs. wth...
o well.... my mum also get angry and say how could he do that... i knwo my mum. like me. usually we are peaceful angels. if we get angry over something, that something usually is something big and wrongful.
and i mean very3 wrong. thats why.. no wonder mum get angry too. me don wan her to angry.. =/ haiz.. poor mum.
but yea.. evolved huh. .or changed for hte better.. i wouldn't used to .. hm.. fight for myself.. i think ..most likely.. ytea.. after i met sam.. he taught me alot.. adn yea..

haiz.. if only.. i could be with him always.. and.. i could be his number one in everything..

oh.. suddenly.. was wondering what to do when i see sam again.. gt some plans.. but yea.. its best if we need not spend money... but.. hm.. yea.. i don care. i hitnk hwats most important is he's by my side. and we can finally have some real dates liek other couples does. hehe. =) walk and wakl.. hold hands.. sit down.. look at the crowds..
..yea... wouldnt htat be the best alreayd?. . hee ^^
i believe.. simple pleasures is hte best. .a lnog as we have one another.

today.. read a news about this couple.. who are married for 35yrs.. and they .. they are glad to have each other. just each other. money doesnt matter to them.  even when they striked lottery. that. is the type of love i yearn for.
nowadasy.. ppl are so busy with their own life.. carreers.. or even theyir own busines.. health.. or children.. they kidna. .forgot.. how dang important it is.. to have a good look at ur own patrtner.. and appreciates who he or she is(to u). this couple. .is what we called.. almost extint rare type of couples. haha... but i believen they exists. adn yea.. as long as both feel the same way of each other.. they do will be able to own such love as them. for money doesnt matter.. as long as they have each other. that is hwat true love is all about. erm.. part of. lol .true love. .mystery.. yet.. lots of amazing reasons behind it all..

ah.. my fren is saying they are offering more pay for htat job. i ended up forgetting all baout it.. and never reply! lool. so yea.. but now. .im starting too like my job better and better.. so.. .yea. i wont go to his side for now. not now. no way. i think.. higher pay doesnt mean u will get happier in life. no no.
u get more money. but everydya u'll rather be happier.
do something .. in lfie.. that'll get u to where u will be happy. not for the sake of money. or any other outside worldy things. find a job.. that will make u happy .let u feel where u are or needed. not for the sake of higher pay. well, if u cant feel happy, hten yea. head for pay. lol.
pursue happiness.. not something.. which u can buy or get..anyhow..

ouch.. m shoudler achign. oh no. i gtg. slp time!!!! hope tmr not tiredddd

ouch.. shoudler..

mata!

Time Tight

hm...
today.. tired day.. duno why.. kept slping throughout.. restless..

hm.. think i had weird dreams..

this is weird.. feeling weird.>
unexpected..
duno why..
maybe tired.
unexpected reactions. .don get it.

haiz. boring day.
but o well.. just rest ba. what to do..

trying to find a nice hotel to settle in at sydney.. but the time could be a lil tricky.. not much rooms left.. alot of expemsive ones..
sighs. if only could stay for 2 weeks.. =/
thx to the hotels..
o well
so yea.. hopefully the tics and hotels wil lsettle breatifully.. leave. ..hm. .should be fine ba. jus say book already. ha. hm.. o well

hm.. not bro coming home tonight.. mum company me abit.. but.. i duno what to say to my parents.
oh.. good thing my throat seems fine now. phew.. ..
shouldn've sang right awya last night.


mata

Throat =(

huu.. haiyo.. =( throat .. haiz.... =/
voice changed .. jsut now playing bro's new game.. singing one. .then yea. T_T... never warm up. .too excited.. then sing.  hurt my throat liao. haiz.......
o well... poor me.. really poor me......................
...

bah...

oh today another customer asked for my name.cos like my service. yay.
yea.. its good..

hm.. feels kinda weird..

oh after about 4days, finally today have a chance to speak with sammy.
but seems like our days stil lthe same

hm... yea.. i like serving customers.. instead of working behind counter.. or do changing the display..

hope tmr wil lheal ba..
haiz.

hm.. hmmm... sianz. o well..
don wanna blog anymore.

mata

Tanner? O.o

hm.. ok.. today abit.. not so busy. .however.. o well.. still okok ba.. .
tired.. abit. ha.
hm.... got a lil ciut on my thumb today.. the other day my lil pinky too.. T_T haiyo..
gotta be watchful ne.. nails not so good too.. dry i think..

then today.. omg. -_- so pain!!! toes cramped!!! cos took off shoes to push the heavy caton boxes!! about 4 piled ontop? then wanna find stocks, omg. =.= go puch using feet, then kena cramped. omg. -_- haizz... but now ok .but pain when cramped. omg..
as for my bruise.. no worries.. will heal in time. .just let it heal ba.. 
ouch

oh.. duno hwy.. when trying fo rmy lingerie, i saw that my skin tone. .like so much darker. i duno.. then i ask bro if im tan. .he say a lil ba. O.o
weird ne.. me no go out much.. neither do i head out in sun.. only at work place. .duno why like htat also tan. lol
but nvm. i like my skin tone colour. i dont like if me look so pale and white and weak.. like no energy..
yea.. met girls liek that before.. skinny like bones , so white and pale looking.. like so fragile. .i dun like. i wanna me to be fleshy, volumpous. ah. .thats the word. lolllll.
must have curves and plus at the righ t place. minus at the right place. XD lol.
nah.. but whats most important is to eat well.. don force oneself to eat too much.. or don eat. thats not good.
so far.. yea. .i m ok. i eat alot as always .lol. snacks.. drinks. .coffee, soda even at late night.. basically if night shift come home.. yea..eat.. o well.
hm.. o well. .abit slpy now .shall head tobed liao..
hm....
weird. .wonde rif im missnig out on anything.. ..hm..
yea thats about it..
i think.

o well. i think anyway.. yea.. i almost forgot. .lol. since young im always darker than my frens. i guess. .thast cos of my dad? no.. lol. mum once told me..
hm.. nah. its a personal thingy. i don wanna share it here. llol. nothing bnig nayway.

mata ne!

Poor Foot

huu.. ouchie... my foot.. kena drop a big heavy box.. onto my foot.. thus hitting my veins.. and swollen..and black.. aw.... a bump now. huu.. =/
o well.. just abit more to go.. with the stocks.. hm.>

oh.. today ne. .manager had a tlak with one of the erm.. eya. not nice ppl who tlak about me. duno.. but. .hm.. i don htink its anything good. .but o well. who cares.
whatver.

haiz.
oh... i don think i ever mentioned this.. cos its like.. such a happy things to say.. but then shortly after, that matter happened. yea.. that bitc*ing matter. .thats why totally no mood to blog about happy stufs...

the last day i met my manager, before she went off, well, she gib me hugs cos i gib her nice pressy.. then when she's leaving.. i truly felt sad, maybe my face expression or what.. then she's like aw.. then hug again.. she say ' you're such a lovely person..'
i was like. .awww... thats such a swt thing t to say to someone. and im happy that she said that.
cos i turly treat ppl with real heart. innocent pure thoughts. unlie ppl.. some ppl trying to get something outta ppl. haiz.. i do like this innocent part of me.. but. .haiz.... sometimes still gets very hurt..


hm... aw.. time to slp again.. soon. o well..
hm.. wow.. imagine . if i head to ssydeny.. oen night. .then next mrg gotta go back.. O.o.. hahaha... its like.. wow? like will have the feeling of.. dd that just happened?  its magic! ah.. if only we could use time travel.. its true ya know thta. its proven. its true.

hm.. k ba.. time to rest again. .times up. .aww....
need to slp liao..
hm.. o well..

todya.. alot of thigns to do. .almost couldnt get em all done.. but yea.. rush them off.. and tada.. tmr continue the bits and poieces ba..

huu.. bruise.. *pouts..  i think my arms not strong enough to carry those boxes huh.. always drop on me =.=

kk.. gtg..
theres good news form sam today. yay.

jaa mata ne^^

Number One Service

hmm... ok.. so.. did i blog ytd? o.O i duno. .got a feeling i din eh.. too lazy to check anyway.net so slow =/

so yea.. wow.. come to thin kof it.. last night. .i just walked around for abit with bro out at town.. but its lie. .wow.! come to thin kiof it, i relaly never been out window shopping ofr sooo long on a sat night!! omggg. hahaha... the most is just afterwork, go watch movie. but never reallky say.. go out. .walk ard town.. shooping centres.. hahaha...
htats so arare.. feel so erm. .refreshing? i duno. ha.
but yea.. it fels kinda nice. .ha. o well.. .then walked past the shops.. tch. .=/ yea .those that i';ve been with. wih sammy.. somerset 313.. when it just opened.. =/ the founatin. we sat on the sofas.. he play psp.. i watch fountains.. then he took pics of pretty fountain... ='/
...hhaiz.. .o well...

so yea.. but ytd was sooooo busy in store. omg. not enough manpower. after im gone, im prety sure htat they're wiped out man . what to do. not enough ppl. o well..

so slpy still. .slpt so late ytd. at hte striked of 4am.. sammy  not up, plus me relaly liek. .gonna knoced out alreayd. .so just head to bed..
theres a halloween movei marathon. so yea slpy sia.. o well
boring to wach alone anyway =/
haiz

oh.. rememerb that red dress i was tlking about? nahhh forget it. took a 2nd look , and dedcidced that it doesnt suit me after all. lol .thank goodness never buy. its ok. will find anotherdress or sumtin for new yeat ba. uh huh. would be fine

hm.. november is here peeps.. 2 montsh to go through. .then yea... =/
i hope everyhing will be alrite..
trying to keep myself balance now.. =/ so yea.
keeping my fingers crossed.
questions i dare not to ask.. i hoppe someday in the future i will have a chance to openly talk abou tit..
hmm,....

watched a movie with mum todya. omg. i have no idea wth we are watching =.,=.......... omg... this is nuts. =.,= dotsssss
whatever. nothing to tlak about htat movie about. sukckxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

XD

hm.... i wonde rif i asked a wrong questions.. =/ this i sreally weird.. i don get it.
sighsssssssss... o well... what to do.. sometims its difficutlt to keep oneself on the sane level when one is too tire dhuh.

ah.. i cant wait to hit the sace. alreyad slpy now.. took a nap just now.. but yea.. hm. .nto enough as usual ha.

what place am i in

i wonder..

hm. .os yea.. =. again. this year.. halloween i din paly a part. haizzz...
hope nexct year i get to eh..>

haiyo. stomach so full.. hm.. but should be able to slp ba..

ha. .duno sicne when.. started to have this.. slping time. .hm.. . o well..
maybe sammys words helped me eh. ha. hm..
but even slping at this time me stil lslpy if mrg shift.

oh ,.that man was back int eh shop!!! i kept forgetting to blog this out! the man who gave me this 'love letter'. not love leter. duno what to called it .so used this term by \from my manager. but yea. omg. .. i was like. .duno how to face him.. then just oh hi, found ur item? ha.

omg! just recalled something again!! sorry.. myu memeory sucks sometimes.. =/

i was sooo touched. by a customers comment. she evev n tell my manager about my serviece! she was saying how good i am, my service.. blah3.. i din know a thing. but when she made payment , she told me about it, as well as saying she's the type of persno who pays attention to customer service. and so far, even my manager she thinks is good. but by far, she think im the best. omggggggggggggggg the best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D
wow... this is such an honour. i mena.. i keep having customers asked for my names. not all males k =.,= its truly cos of my good service ., omg. i am so touch. i just said tahnk you to her. i duno what else to say. i saiod i was touched by her words. wow. that is so wow. makes everything pays off. my job is worth it. suddenly. lol>
so yea... at first i thought i was mere concidence that custoomer skeep asking for my names  before they left. then turns out.. it happens more frequesnt every.. almost every day. wow... i would love to keep this up.
hm.. though... my sg manager wont appreciate for sure..
but at least the melb could tell.. i htink. lol. so yea.. its good enough..
plus my previcous manager sabrina told my melb regional manager that i am very good.
hmm.. i duno. future is future.. ofr now.. i relaly need to work hard.. pay attention to destails..
yea.. come to htin of it.. lol. i had nooooo idea how big a character my rg manager was... htat time when she first met me.. then shewas saying. .oh heard sabrina told me u were a big seller. very good..(or something like that) i would expect to see mroe form u in the future then. bthen she laugh.. but no pressure on me she said.
i was like.. o..k.. im alreayd blushing... then sabrina just stand aside and smile. dotsss... sudeenly recaleld all these... wow. i didnt know shes such a big character back then.. and to have sabrina said that to her, wow. .its relaly something. =)
uh huh...... ...
..so yea.. wow.

i really.. yea. .sometimes it took me lomng enough to . .u knwo. find out the truth..' sometimes i mightv;e neglet whats the thruth lying before me. .but... usually. I WILL find out. it will sudenly occurred to me, and i'll realised something is wrong. and i find out the truth. somtiems.. .. no.. most of hte times are bad =( sadly.. yea...
cos i couldnt realised it earlier. .thought it was hte truth. .then realised. .ppl been lying to me baou tit...
no matter how small the matter is..
yea.. o well.. sometimes.. all the answees just come to me like.. sovling a long itme mizzing piece of puzzle..
it'll appeared outta nowhere. but i Will find it. i wil llearned abou tit. and i will know the truth which i did not previously. no matter how long it was ago.

hm... ok.. time to stop here...
back hurts.abit. .so yea..

throat. .dry.. need water now..
bah.. tmr cold be better huh>? ..

o well....

mata ........

Be Happy

ah.. finally.. these 2 nights i rememberd to take my med. .though. .thoraot still coughing here and there.. .o well

omg... =.= todya.. cos no one to lock the door. .then redz say wanna wait for him 5mins. then ended up he came outta toilet, still wnana go bath. i was .. yea.. angry. i don like. if gonna be more than 5mins, why ask me to wait????
 thats is very wrong .  i don like. but yea.. haiz. in the end i missed my bus, and i reched just on time. perhaps a couple of secs late. but my manager say i just mafe it. so yea. phewwwwwwwwwwwww omg. i hate this 12.30 aftnoon shifts=/
sianz

anyway... hm.. yea. haiz.. hate it.

hm...
well.. seems to me that.. our rm.. relaly not good ne.. =/ haiz. long story.. but yea.. i duno what to say...
haiz.. he's not cut out for htis com[pany. seriously. he's good at tlaking. but tats it. the way he handle stuffs, isnt what this company expects. i know. i could tell. haiz.. so wasted.. why sabrina picked him? =/
cos he;s so good with tlaking to ppl laugh2.. joke.2... then behinfs ppl bakc. .duno do what.
anyway. .enough of him.

hm.... yea. .hungry.. only had breads.. oh. .saw this dress... huuuuuu... yea. know me right. .fallen in 'love' at first sight.. then yea.. huu... i want!!!! but its abit expensive.. im trying to convince my bro. lol. get that for me as xmas present .lol. cos he owe me abit of money. lol.
huu... i really like it alot! but i think its the kind of dress i will only wear during chy, and to club. but if club. i don even dare to step outta the road!!! dots. anyway,, i rarely hardly ever have any night out. so nah. but even if for cny.. omg. wothr it i hope? ha. me no buy.. so never try that out.. .haiz.
i like thta alot ne.. .huu... wanna buy.. but yea.. cannot.. see how my bro's side first. .anywya still must get my money back. lol
so yea.
anwya.. yea.. see how ba. ah.. suitable to wear for xmas too eh. ha. .o well

hm. .seems liek tehre could be a delay.. ... maybe.. yea.. i might be workling with those ppl for another more weekssss to go. anwyay. im not afraid of them. i work as usual. talk only about work now. nothign else. whatever.
let them suffer coming to work like that too. i have a feeling. they alreayd knew. no. its confirmed. im sure they alreayd knew i know about htis fb thingy. but i got this feeling they know manager from melb who just returned to shop, alreyad heard about it from me.
ha. one of them even seems to wanna quit. whatever!!
what age alreayd. stil dare to do such evil thing to me. should it be my turn to say serves them right>? nope. i don wanan be part of them. argh.
anwayy, yea. whatever they wanna do. i don care.
me just work my own.busy is good liek i said. time pass, day flies. .soon.. please. .nov.. then dec.. let dec be over. .then i'll be yay..

wow.. really ne.. thexe couple of days been so happy. like. .so long never really felt this way. O.o duno ba..
anyway, just glad this stone been lifted off my chest.
hm.. and hopefully i'll stay this way for as long as possible. ...
hm. .yea....
cos its always difficult. .trying to be happy when the most important person isnt next to u everydya.....

ok. time to rest down!

ohhh. .i just recaleld something. =( huu... the other time, i think .. i duno... was it last year .. end of year before me go sydney? or what.. butim pretty sure it was a xmas season i saw.there was this black beautiful looking erm.. kinda like corset thing? i duno.. its pretty long. .looks like a corset. i forgot wjhat happen.. i think i mentioned to my female frne.. so pretty.. really  so wanna buy it. .but wasted mnoey.. cos bf not around.. wear so nice. .no one can see also..
i think i said somethig liek that. so never buy...

but i recently just saw the pic on internet (i think) . omg. i relaly want it!! dots. it was gorgeous! and me no buy it. huu... i shouldve think this way.. nvm.. next time he can still see.. and i can wear good, feel good too.
XD ha/ but yea... aw.. so wasted..... =/ so nice sia..
o well...... what to do. ranges are like that one.. once gone, wont come back = / haiz. nvm ba..

hm. .slpy liao.. k..
hopefully sammy's side will go well. he must be playing hard. .and looking all dash andhot. ;) thats my man! lol
miss him.. =/ he'll think of me ne? uh huh.. going to dreamland.. perhaps could see him there. ok, well then.
final off for htis week...month i mena.. i gotta cherish it this weekend.
k, gambat!!!!

mata