freedom soonnnn

omg its been way too lonog ive totaly forgotten aboutt blogging

been crazily busy.
sweats tears fatique etc

so glad this evening onwards finally my workload will be lighter. cos i helped my rm run her region and its yea.. wouldve been earier if i don have to handle my own storel ..cos for them usually they get to move ard and check in their stores.
so much busy periods that i encountered. liek new ppl,
store packdown thigns like that

and alrdy encountered few malays with family members died.
no wonder the rmm used to say they  get so many deaths and even dog gone missing kinda thing

o well

soooo oglad tmr off and i can finally slp in without waking up early

like legit if youre a rm u definitely needs to be up before 10/ or when ppl start calling u for mc

its a nice experience though. wish theres someone to guide me instead of one shot leave everything for me

even when the sg rm first started out her new role as rm, she has the sydney rm to guide her step by step along

anywyayyy

gtg soon

great to blog again

so tired. need to tc of my health more=/
mata

stressed out sales period. hate it

soooo stressed out and busyyy =/

my mum and frens caught myself staring into space(cos i was thinkin abt work )

and ive been slping late. blah3... this sales period sucks.

so much to be done

sighs

my colleague and shes the longest in this company..3 yrs. recently mc 1 week. she felt dizzy. she was sick before but almost well.. then yea one day it happen.

and doc say probably shes too tense and stress out

and recently she told me.. its not worth her health. and she finally decided to quit by jan next yr.
well after geting bonus duh

she also hav the same thoughts.. like how we envy other store staffs when we walked past the usual quiet stores

it all comes down to... yes. more money but u work ur ass off. or lesser money and for her she think she will be happier.

there was this youtuber who reecently commented tht.. .she keeps changing jobs. and one day she decided to just stop it.
and took a risk. and quit her job and do youtube.
its sad to see ppl struggling and being unhappy in their life with work.
she say shes happy now.

they all made a decision. and its a risk theyre willing to take.

for me... i duno yet. im still along the line of seeing what will happen..

cos i know they trust my capabilities.. and thinks highly of me.
..hence the added stress. cos i dun wanan disappoint them. or u know. let their expectation of me drop.
and im abt to run the top store next week. im so nnervoius anxious and worried and stress.. i know i can do it. but its just so.. .o well.

yea shld be fine bah.. .right? everything...

i saw something today at river.
its crazy
like.. gosh. why did i even bother to check it out=.=

and maybe nothing to do with it. this big doll almost fell on me (it landed right next to me) when  i was browsing. kk..better don think liao. though that image is so vivd=/

i wonoder if thats just an excuse... monthssssss ago my fren say she like it better now that shes put on weight. like fatter.
cos clothes suits her better look nicer(rather than skinner) . and ppl complimented on her that she looks better than when she was so skinny.
she say hse herself like her size now better .
then one night.. weeks ago i think? her ex bf fren saw her. and he's the v straight forward type. say it out loud. eh why u so fat now?? like keep repeating ask her. omg
cos last time they met yrs ago she was still v v skinny.

then after that night. .she took slimming pills.

and hte things she told me all opposite.

i asked her again(cos i remmeber her saying fatter is better) .. and she say.. ofc skinnier fit all clothes better. i asked.. u like urself meatier or skinnier. she say of cos when she was skinner. ppl say she look better. etc. li ke all opposite of what she told me monthsssss ago.

but those words she told me monthsss ago sounds so real.

so i duno.

taat guy ar. rrly mess her up man.
so stupid to be so hurtful and straightforward to a woman
=.=

so yea. .. maybe she didnt lied?? maybe she just forgotten how she used to like being more fleshy with her body.
she snot that fat. but... like. big size.. .abit more fleshy than being chubby.

anyway.. haiz. if only that guy kept his mouth shut.

jaa mata

worst stressful week ever =(

didnt blog last night but actually wanted to..

sooooo fed up. and i literally lost my cool first time. and also the first time i cried in store over work.

childrens running ard. mother don car.e blah3... ive so much work. im so stressed out alrdy etc... u know the scene in shrek 4 happily ever after? ... beginning of movie. his babies all crying piggies ate his cake.. balloon popping... ppl running ard. etcetc... he then lets out a big roar... then he smash his fist onto the cake,
now THAT< , was exactly how i felt. i felt shrek . liek so weird. but its the same scenerio.
i even commented loudly i dun understand these ppl.

sighs
=(

its been a rrly hectic stressful full of tasks every single day of the week. ive been slping late woke up early.
and i don slp comfortable anymore. i sooo sooo wish to move out. my fren hava  place but im not gonna waste my money and pay rent besides its too far.

so yea. if i blog last night sure words gonna be worse.

and this duno this girl in her early 20s or i duno. she look like early 20s... anywayyyy . she was with her mum. she wanna use her gold amex credit to pay. my  machine faulty. she say she want points for that c ard. hello????? its bloody $9 item!!!!!! use ur own cash. stop using ur parents credit!!!!!
get ur ass moving and get to work b****

then i say cannot work she give the abit irritated look. saying 'wasted my points'. crazy. $9 item onlky. go to next store which is etude house. like gooooooo but ofc i din say that to her. but tat face of a bloody rich girl (gold amex shld be rich family right  i think?) with that stupid look on her face pls. somemore she look presentable but her heart like this.. or rather her attitude like s is such a put off and disgusting. like legit DISGUSTIng.

sorry im getting fired up here.

theres so much anger in me =((((
like form all these stress builind up this whoel weke. lil things cust sas or do rrly irks me so much. its like im a vocalno thats why i explodede when those chikdredns keep screaming and making huge mess while im trying to refill my items

and im like wanna cry most of the time.. and im so stressed out. and i try to control it cos i dun wanna suddenly get fed u with my mum or family u know. especially when parents sometimes nagging etc.

and i duno how to release these tentions and stress =(

online didnt help
tv im not interested
usually evening time onwards my parents uses it to watch their chinese shows which im not intereted

so yea

now i feel like just shop3... shoppin g retail therapy
but tats not a gd idea either. .sighs i duno wat to do

its liek those moment if someone weer to bump into me and make a rude remark, i will probablhy give her a slap

no. not rrly ha

proably just say bitc*

sighs

ok rant over. gonna figure out how to relax later on

rrlhy wanna go out on my all. some alone quiet me time.. but always feel stress cos like leaving mum at home.

i just feel like living alonne. like.. hav my own freedom.
a nice clean space to do my hobby to slp in no bugs etc

so stress.. crying wont help. but i still cry... =(

and i emntioned befor ewhen i was in sydney sammsy fren mentioned how his gf woke up with his snoring and she was crying so badly for him to stop snoring cos she couldnt slp.. he said it was liek legit bad . and she was doing a duno fullshift day or sutin and she was tired out

now tat one i can feel too. like so tired and stressful .. things like this sure irritates and upset u, and yea ofc will cry like mad. that feleing sucks. i tottally get how shes feeling .

hoepfully i will feel better soon.

mata=/

mata

passion for ur job

hey guys.been workng at town aare lately... busy2... and yet im kinda used to it.. jut not used to how messy their cupboards are...
my fulltimer recently promoted to asm... so happy for her after al lthe training we went through.. .but shes upset cos the sm there pinoy..mean to her.. and their cupboards and evreyting is so messy

/i used to think if im being too strict with them etc.. now im glad. im glad my store is the way it is now. with the help of great team ofc.
without rules and boundaries, theres cerntainly no nice store. no wodner alot of other tea memebr came into my store and say its so neat. now i understand why.

saw my fren took up this makeup forever class thing months back... dunogot cert or wat kind. but anywya... saw her pics. .seems liek shes working for them now... doing makeup for gigs show event kinda thing. ..
then she commented.. doing what she love...

then... im kinda jealou... cos.. as gd as i am.. (oh ytd a lady asked if i wanna join their company... haha.. .anwyay) ... yea. ..i like this job.but i don love it. its not liek my huge passion for accessories.
and yea....

haiz. ppl say... chase after ur dreams.. but i duno how. and . .theres too much at stake u see.

haiz. .o wellllll see how life takes me then.

when u work for money, and youre not the boss, most lielly its not rrly the passon that youre after. ..

to wake up and being able to do what u love.. is the bes.t. after all.. .most of our lifetimes...theyre spend on working.. unless youre born with a golden spoon in ur mouth

jaa

kept in draft oops. . this should be when i was still on AL

was playing this conversation starter thing with my colleague the other day.
and one thing she said admired me about is that im strong, and like no matter how tough the situation is at work, or the times i cracked under pressure (yes my blody job is blood tough) , i always bounce back and nvr give up.

its thigns liek that i don notice, and having ur team meber complimented that great thing abt u is so.. amazing.
and i feel proud of myself.
i dunno how words get into other stores that im hardworking=.=
but im glad rm knows. my fren told me.
but yea. .its weird. and in a way i disliek how words gets around u know.
im not the type to go talk2 gossip etc. im just doing my own job. yea.
so iduno how in the world my hardwork gets to their ears. strange. ppls mouth i tell u. .but luckiy its a gd compliment

mm... so yea.

forgot wat others to say.. .as usual.

sighs. sianz going back to work.
=/
wat to do.

and i hurt my sole. so painful .1 chunk of skin peeled offT_T
i rememebr that time my hand cut by fan still got sammy help me.
and i made a mistake by not washing my wound before i put on plaster overnight. argh

anyway plaster is v bloody. eew. im having a painful time trying to walk =/

mata

sick few days =(

i fell sick
few days back

throat hurts... coughing.. .and recently i got a runny nose altogether.

so paiseh when meeting started, i was coughing so badly. arghhh
irritating

a customer even told me to get a day off. ha rm was there duno she got hear anot

but yea. today still so slpy and unwell. dread going to work today =(
didnt get much rest either. with stocktake going on etc.. and then meeting on my off day =) arghhh

thaat explains why im still so tird and slpy now .wish i coulde slp more =/
though its past 11am

haiz

anyway
will do my best today bah. though i rrly didnt feel like opening up my mouth and talk.
=/
haiz

kk.. gtg.
just a short blog. health hasnt been great lately. and no time to go for run cos just too slpy with all these super early mrg shifts. =/ 6-6 mind u. supposed to hav 2 hrs break. according to our law here. but think she duno. so i took only an hr break. andn claim the other hr on other day.
by the end of day, i was so beat up =/

mon helping with another stores stockatake.
then next day 8am again. just that its 8-6 cos not my off day .
sianzz=(

haiz... hopefully i wil lget well sooon bah.. .hoepfully sunday wont decide to see doc

jaa

breaking down

so this youtuber right... he's gay...  and he was saying he refused brochure from two girls (about jesus and stuff).. and as he walked passed them.. he heard them says.. he must be a faggort etc... he then walked back, and in no offense to christians etc.. .he said to them.. something abt jesus borned.. blah2... and they are whores. the girls looked shoccked.
and he just walked on...

like seriously. they mustve been paid to do this brochure.. if not. if youre a true blue christian, why would u judge and comment about this gay? (duno if he wore makeup when hes walking there)

my fren told me.. .theres this one time.
she sin her bf place right . no bra. and rrly wanna go toilet. so she just put on shirt. she and her fiance quite plump. but shes still ok looking.
her fiance younger broa nd frens were out in living room hanging out. she no choice but to go toilet. then one of his yohunger bro fren sorta give her that look. up and down look? and asked who is she. ur sis? then he say no its his elder bro gf.
then when shes back in her room sher overheaerd his fren saying.. 'mustve been nice to bang her' .then her fiance heard it and confronted his frens. and he tell his bro to let them get out before he step outta his room later.

i thin thats so cool to stand out for ur gf. so cool. rrly.

some man woulve pretended nvr heard it.

anyway...

and recently she was tellign me... how her bf been working  hard and kinda neglecting her la... cos he 's trying to earn more money for the future.  he also dun wan her to work when shes married.wan her be a housewife. (its her dream anyway ).. then it strikes me when she says(i think she told him) ..
theres no future if shes not there ( at the end) .
as in.. if u don love her enuff..neglated her..... .and she decided to leave, then there wont be two of them anymore anyway in the future.

stressed out abt work ne.

and night slp was pretty bad two nights before... lat night 3hrs slp so din exprience anything.
but yea...
couldnt tell anyone. .
think imma offer josssticks again tonight.

sghs

sad.
i don feel good at all at this point
yet  i nid to focus on sales..etc

haiz.. wha tto do. higer pay, meaning more work.

more stress

personal stress.. work stress... i hate it all.
im breaking down

mata