struggling moments

whoa. bro was saying why keep having hte rotting smell in kitchen. then i was lije.. hey rememebr the movie in conjuring? 

i thought he farted u know. but i dunno how many times it occured already. but its only for a short passing moment. to be honestm.. its seventh month. .anything can happen... .but dang it. he souldnt ve said it out loud jus tnow =/ 

be it supernatural or what,.......
i have enough probs in my hand so yea. 

i don care

gosh. dreamt of cute puppies. dunn owhy redz is in there arghhh =.= 

but yea.. bro brought home . three. naw... so real. really thought they're mine. 

then wakey, gosh. all those happy feelings are gone. =( 

sianz. 

at least i was happy for that moment 

haiz .

still feeling listelss.. and thiknig alot.. stress. feelign down. very negative.. like i can cry anytime.. am i being depressed i wonder

depression maybe? maybe jsut sterssed out ba

lighten up abit after a bottle of tea. bought it as i neede a perk me up drink 

nice to company sammy till he slp 

anywya, yea.. still unsure of u know. where im heading

dunno how the visa is gonna work its way

everyday im struggling to stay positive at work .

its difficult to u know. and its difficult to talk about

so unhealthy to keep it 

need more soothing tea ba. at least its caffine didnt kill me as much as coffee does

coughed more today. more than ytd. its starting to get to my throat now. hoep i'll reemebr to take med later

hav a feelign tmr might be worse. 

nose stil lsticky as ever

eew

so nice. this youtube lady get to move from perth to syd , stay at bondi apartment. 20yrs old i think. haha so rich eh. 

but what i envy most is her apartment. gosh. so nice. imagien u get ur own furniture, everythign nice and clean. start from scratch. nice kitchen.. everythign clean. u can have ur own set of plates, tbale chairs rugs, table. .spacious.. 

sooooo niceeeeeeeeeeee

thats what i'll have wanted too ba

soemtimes the most simplest thing in life.. cant be achieved without money. 

i don liek that kind of thiking though. cos money ..financial issue. .it kills ppl ya know. 

it kills them inside out. slowly. 

its terrible. 

anway,.. such talk.. 

erm. yea. hopefully... 

haiz.. i'll feel better ba

both pyscially and emtionally 

i think the last time i truly felt happiness and smile sincerely from inside out, was during the time with sammy eh. 

i can feel that i am losing my glow now. the inner glow that shines when u smile. that glow im talking about.. 

i feel like im struggling so hard.. its so difficult to stay on the line. .

haiz. o well

if only this visa thign can be a miracle. say oh settle in a few weeks time. gosh. i'll be the happiest girl for year 2013. 

its a great tiem for em to start anew, learn new fresh thigns, get away from this boring life, thats making me suffocating every single seconds... 

and most of all ,he's tehre. 

so yea. 

if only huh.. 

oh man. gottta rush through my library books. deadlin in two days! 

mata