birthday specials

omg it suddenly dawned on me abt blogging!!! =.. // been extremely busy and tired without social ife lately sighs. due to xma snad work.

so yea. hoepfully next wek will rememebr to blog

life just been so hectic and busy. shockingly its almost mid of dec. like whatttt

today came across fren posted pic of her bf gave her the latest rose gold phone and planned a surprise hotel or sumtin with her best frens for her.

duno leh. it slike. .when frens liike talkled abt how much money they spend on their partners. im llike..
mm.. ok,.. i wonoder how that feels.
i duno
im curious. yet i doubt its gonna happen cos sammy didnt konw my frens and bovi we're not in same country
and.. yea.

maybe one day eh.
who knows

but its intriguing... like..
cos i didnt eperience any big birthdya kind y aknow..
so yea

anyway.

umst rememebr..don envy others.
love hat u alrdy own

and be grateful

jaa mata

ranting abt work

omg frgot ablt blog again gomen=((

so.. xas.. omg. shockingly nov is end now.

dec week s hectic...

my fren told me... rm form sydney was saying...if sm cant handelde a 6 days work of 53 hrs, then they aint fit to be a sm

ubt hey . thats australia.

this is sg.

we worked night shifts.
we have family and frens.
we need slp

like. .i undertsand why she cant uuderstadn that cos shes aussie. but.. /=

a lilll too harsh ya know

if only the aussie worked our shifts of clsoing etc

she wass so sure oh aussie stocks to sg is gonn be stickers with sales prices based on her 11 yrs with htis company. guessed what. nope. its alwayas been like tht. nvr ever stickered. welcome to sg. wellscome to aussie way of orking in warehouse

haiz

just wanna rant abit.

or more

 i woke up so early. me and my colleague evevn dreatmt the samme thing abt vm wokr

and.. .i duno isi anxiety or what. ive been so nervous heart umping etc...
pumpng..

cos when i think abt work and rm =///

haiz. ..

jaa mata

go for where your love and passion is. choose ur own life.

was watching this youtuber blogging abt how he returned to uni. cos its either he wokr this job for the rest of his life, or he take a risk/chance at this uni thing

he said that he glad he chose to quit and do uni. his gf was supportive if ont he wouldnve gone for it either.

though alot of ppl his family and frens discourage him to go bck to uni he still did.
and.. he said htat he made the right choice. like. .wats there to lose right.

anwyay,
i tihkn most importatnly is knowing what u want despite what other ppl keeps telling u.

u leadur lfie and all .he ofc worriede he if might disappointment his family etc.. but in the end. its shi choice. his life. so.. .yea

i rrly admire that.
like.. no matter how hard it is, u go with r gut feelings, ur choic.e u lead ur life. u chose ur life. no one is making the decision for u.

he's enjoying hwat he's doing now. he dun wan to be miserable for hte rest of his life working for something he didnt like. and coming home be shitty abt it. thats why he decided to quit it.

yea. ..i think thats cool .and so admiring.

sometimes it makes me think abit of my life too. ha.

ofc i wish to be doing osmehting i love and interested in doing.. but

o well

just syaing

go for what u love

mata

exam period/ disappointments

wanna blog before i forget

gosh... saw this camera i rrly like. like my dream camera.

and.. argh.. its definitely on my bucket list.

canon something where u can flip the screen and seflie and video. i htink i would love the video part cos its so amazingly clear. and say u were out at uss, u'll know where ur video is going even if u wanna shoot urself.in the vid.if that make sense=.=

ahaz. anwyay. yeaaaa why did i go test use ittt arghhhh i gotta get it outta my head

finally get to relaz abit this wekeend. time flies when its ur off.

i woke up. feeling so aweosme on sunday morning. oh am iw orking: ? oh yayyyy finally can sl in and im offffff no rm phone with me either haha

i think that. in a relatinoship right. u gotta give and take. and ofc trust.
annd sometimes ur partner may be pushing u away be it intentionally or  not, due to some.. busy reasons and stuffs.
like.. it makes u wanna act.. action on someething i mean. then u stop .
like.
i duno haha.

oh gosh. im hopeing this week at town im going to... perform better than last time.
and. .yea thats my goal.

slpy.
 slpt late woke up late

but soooo nice to slp in whiel its raining today

kk. .gtg enjoy some vids and rest

sammy think he's stil lbusy with his studies. .he say wil lmsg when he's done since last night .so i nvr drop him a msg today ow ell

exmas huh... i dunno hows it liek to tress on abt and so.. u knoow.

cos my parents nvr forced me or push me to pass or get into top 10etc

i nvr study before exam .and yet i passed and i even got into top 10 in class.

perhaps nowadyas studies are more ...stressful eh?

i duno .whenever i heard my frens saying how they stress abbt studying etc.. im liek. ..huh? i don even study or stress before exma. its like life is as per noramll.. .not braggin .but i just dunno how it feels liek to study and stress abt exams before the date.

im glad though. ..that evemnwithout parents pushing, im stil able to do my thang and able to pass. haha. thank god

i am so sad now. cos so nice to slp in. i silent my phone. bro caleld me in mrg i didnt hear. etc. long story short. he left sephora alryd

now shop closed. he say last day there proabbly wont go .cos going ot other places. i so sad onw=(

sighs

liek sad.... rrly sad and disappointed.
i say will pay for his cabfare.

haiz.... why oh why am i aslp at wron gtiming

whyyy

=/
so disappointed. ..sighs

my bro say ask me ship to sammy then he ship to me.

but like. .duh. what if his parents saw its frmo sephora or wat. ..haiz... nvm bah.. .

so exp to ship to sg even from online=((

theres this nz youtuber.r poor thing. at a club she got a glass threw upon her head andwith alonside shattering glass... like... wat... tat person couldntve been a hate or wat. cos she knew whats her youtbe name. she sliek calling out her nae. .before thorwoing it against her heaad.

seriuosl.. in au... thank god im not anyone famous... now htese youtubers cant even go on to have fun = /
are the ppl there usulay so vilent after dirnks> .?? apprantly what theys aid.. its  maing me think yes=/


mata ne

Im back!(hopefully i wont forget)

OMG i just realizsed!!!!!=(( i didnt blog for sooo long!!! is that part of the reason why im so stressed out more than ever recently?

holding onto my rm phone again...
totally lost it. my temper i mean when i was on holiday mood off days.. due to something2 need to do more work at home

roster s etc... took a nice bath then suddenly tema emmebr asked blah3... she sclose to me so yea. she understand .  i was legit shouting and cursing over the phone. using cured words. haiz.. .

and i was crying again.

the  other day my ptimer wanna say cant work on imprt day. i cried as well. its somehting i cant control. cos i was so tired working long hours. after 9hrs work yet still trying to make the changes at home. owrking extxra hours

 when i read news why one shouldnt bring work to home, i understand. but i din grasp the reality of the truth. which is  rrly hard. it totallys blends into ur personal life.

i dun tlak tomy family .i get moody and angry and frustrated.. etc

sighs

its rrly ..not gd. for anyone= /

why did i kena the worst days

again rosters changes.

i done my best. calling and noting etc everything

i felt great having achieved it WITHOUT anyone teaching me
by right shld have mah

even when this rm from sg get promoted theres my syd rm teaching her along the way =/

they think im super capable ar

even if i am, itd taken a toll on my mental health and physically

anyway i try to relaze as much as i can by sihgs tmr till 1am again

i should blog more. how can i rememebr not to forget=/

i was out today and was literally ...upset that i have to do more roster work at home

sighs

anyway

...

and thres this wedding thing.

ok. this pinoy changed off for her wedding day no fri.
rm approved it. but the top (state manager) rm didnt

so she was liek. u cant. why . u knew ur based off not fri why u wanna change

blah3..... .if she can find pt to replace then u can off. if not u work

in the end she found

but thats so sa.d

=/ she cried in the midst of it all

on the other hand i understnd why shes so adamant abt no chanign offs.

cos for rm to do rosters , it takes 1 full day or 2. and for them to anyhow change, its liek an insult to the rm face.
like what are u treating these rosters as> ? toys or rubbish?

cos its allhardowrk thats been putinto it...

haiz.

o wlel.

anyway. oh this aussie lady shes a pretty famous youtuber. then couple of times ...alot of itmes infact, she got boob grabbed. and now she say she snot going to club anymore. even her youtuber fren as well.
cos she say onoce ppl gets drunk, they will be rude' to her.she had fake boob job. so thats why more ppl will like... poke her or smoething or grabbed her and say. oh its fake!

haiz... poor hting

anyway.

otdya was having a destress full on meal. then my fren went get something. i was alone watching tv. then this waiter , walked past and say hi plus waved to me.

i was like. ... .wat... O.o
then i smiled abit and watch tv again pretended nothing happened... =.= omg. soooo oaawkward. i was praying for my fren to be back!!!

somemroe i have no makeup on. in my old home clothes kind. ..so yea.

omg.

sooo stressful.

my frne asked im uncomfortabe ard guys ar. i say yea. she then asked if i don have any guy frens then? i say no. but just that if i knew or sense hwat intentions he has, i will avoid that situation ya knowo

my 6th sense is almost always accurate.

gosh i miss blogging...

onto youtube too much eh =/ and work..

ohhh just relaized my last blog... almost once a month blog! cos i wa stkaing over my rm role!! if.. jsut IF in future im a rm.. will i give up on my bloggin> like totally foreget to blog? =/

talk soon.

ja amata =/

freedom soonnnn

omg its been way too lonog ive totaly forgotten aboutt blogging

been crazily busy.
sweats tears fatique etc

so glad this evening onwards finally my workload will be lighter. cos i helped my rm run her region and its yea.. wouldve been earier if i don have to handle my own storel ..cos for them usually they get to move ard and check in their stores.
so much busy periods that i encountered. liek new ppl,
store packdown thigns like that

and alrdy encountered few malays with family members died.
no wonder the rmm used to say they  get so many deaths and even dog gone missing kinda thing

o well

soooo oglad tmr off and i can finally slp in without waking up early

like legit if youre a rm u definitely needs to be up before 10/ or when ppl start calling u for mc

its a nice experience though. wish theres someone to guide me instead of one shot leave everything for me

even when the sg rm first started out her new role as rm, she has the sydney rm to guide her step by step along

anywyayyy

gtg soon

great to blog again

so tired. need to tc of my health more=/
mata

stressed out sales period. hate it

soooo stressed out and busyyy =/

my mum and frens caught myself staring into space(cos i was thinkin abt work )

and ive been slping late. blah3... this sales period sucks.

so much to be done

sighs

my colleague and shes the longest in this company..3 yrs. recently mc 1 week. she felt dizzy. she was sick before but almost well.. then yea one day it happen.

and doc say probably shes too tense and stress out

and recently she told me.. its not worth her health. and she finally decided to quit by jan next yr.
well after geting bonus duh

she also hav the same thoughts.. like how we envy other store staffs when we walked past the usual quiet stores

it all comes down to... yes. more money but u work ur ass off. or lesser money and for her she think she will be happier.

there was this youtuber who reecently commented tht.. .she keeps changing jobs. and one day she decided to just stop it.
and took a risk. and quit her job and do youtube.
its sad to see ppl struggling and being unhappy in their life with work.
she say shes happy now.

they all made a decision. and its a risk theyre willing to take.

for me... i duno yet. im still along the line of seeing what will happen..

cos i know they trust my capabilities.. and thinks highly of me.
..hence the added stress. cos i dun wanan disappoint them. or u know. let their expectation of me drop.
and im abt to run the top store next week. im so nnervoius anxious and worried and stress.. i know i can do it. but its just so.. .o well.

yea shld be fine bah.. .right? everything...

i saw something today at river.
its crazy
like.. gosh. why did i even bother to check it out=.=

and maybe nothing to do with it. this big doll almost fell on me (it landed right next to me) when  i was browsing. kk..better don think liao. though that image is so vivd=/

i wonoder if thats just an excuse... monthssssss ago my fren say she like it better now that shes put on weight. like fatter.
cos clothes suits her better look nicer(rather than skinner) . and ppl complimented on her that she looks better than when she was so skinny.
she say hse herself like her size now better .
then one night.. weeks ago i think? her ex bf fren saw her. and he's the v straight forward type. say it out loud. eh why u so fat now?? like keep repeating ask her. omg
cos last time they met yrs ago she was still v v skinny.

then after that night. .she took slimming pills.

and hte things she told me all opposite.

i asked her again(cos i remmeber her saying fatter is better) .. and she say.. ofc skinnier fit all clothes better. i asked.. u like urself meatier or skinnier. she say of cos when she was skinner. ppl say she look better. etc. li ke all opposite of what she told me monthsssss ago.

but those words she told me monthsss ago sounds so real.

so i duno.

taat guy ar. rrly mess her up man.
so stupid to be so hurtful and straightforward to a woman
=.=

so yea. .. maybe she didnt lied?? maybe she just forgotten how she used to like being more fleshy with her body.
she snot that fat. but... like. big size.. .abit more fleshy than being chubby.

anyway.. haiz. if only that guy kept his mouth shut.

jaa mata

worst stressful week ever =(

didnt blog last night but actually wanted to..

sooooo fed up. and i literally lost my cool first time. and also the first time i cried in store over work.

childrens running ard. mother don car.e blah3... ive so much work. im so stressed out alrdy etc... u know the scene in shrek 4 happily ever after? ... beginning of movie. his babies all crying piggies ate his cake.. balloon popping... ppl running ard. etcetc... he then lets out a big roar... then he smash his fist onto the cake,
now THAT< , was exactly how i felt. i felt shrek . liek so weird. but its the same scenerio.
i even commented loudly i dun understand these ppl.

sighs
=(

its been a rrly hectic stressful full of tasks every single day of the week. ive been slping late woke up early.
and i don slp comfortable anymore. i sooo sooo wish to move out. my fren hava  place but im not gonna waste my money and pay rent besides its too far.

so yea. if i blog last night sure words gonna be worse.

and this duno this girl in her early 20s or i duno. she look like early 20s... anywayyyy . she was with her mum. she wanna use her gold amex credit to pay. my  machine faulty. she say she want points for that c ard. hello????? its bloody $9 item!!!!!! use ur own cash. stop using ur parents credit!!!!!
get ur ass moving and get to work b****

then i say cannot work she give the abit irritated look. saying 'wasted my points'. crazy. $9 item onlky. go to next store which is etude house. like gooooooo but ofc i din say that to her. but tat face of a bloody rich girl (gold amex shld be rich family right  i think?) with that stupid look on her face pls. somemore she look presentable but her heart like this.. or rather her attitude like s is such a put off and disgusting. like legit DISGUSTIng.

sorry im getting fired up here.

theres so much anger in me =((((
like form all these stress builind up this whoel weke. lil things cust sas or do rrly irks me so much. its like im a vocalno thats why i explodede when those chikdredns keep screaming and making huge mess while im trying to refill my items

and im like wanna cry most of the time.. and im so stressed out. and i try to control it cos i dun wanna suddenly get fed u with my mum or family u know. especially when parents sometimes nagging etc.

and i duno how to release these tentions and stress =(

online didnt help
tv im not interested
usually evening time onwards my parents uses it to watch their chinese shows which im not intereted

so yea

now i feel like just shop3... shoppin g retail therapy
but tats not a gd idea either. .sighs i duno wat to do

its liek those moment if someone weer to bump into me and make a rude remark, i will probablhy give her a slap

no. not rrly ha

proably just say bitc*

sighs

ok rant over. gonna figure out how to relax later on

rrlhy wanna go out on my all. some alone quiet me time.. but always feel stress cos like leaving mum at home.

i just feel like living alonne. like.. hav my own freedom.
a nice clean space to do my hobby to slp in no bugs etc

so stress.. crying wont help. but i still cry... =(

and i emntioned befor ewhen i was in sydney sammsy fren mentioned how his gf woke up with his snoring and she was crying so badly for him to stop snoring cos she couldnt slp.. he said it was liek legit bad . and she was doing a duno fullshift day or sutin and she was tired out

now tat one i can feel too. like so tired and stressful .. things like this sure irritates and upset u, and yea ofc will cry like mad. that feleing sucks. i tottally get how shes feeling .

hoepfully i will feel better soon.

mata=/

mata

passion for ur job

hey guys.been workng at town aare lately... busy2... and yet im kinda used to it.. jut not used to how messy their cupboards are...
my fulltimer recently promoted to asm... so happy for her after al lthe training we went through.. .but shes upset cos the sm there pinoy..mean to her.. and their cupboards and evreyting is so messy

/i used to think if im being too strict with them etc.. now im glad. im glad my store is the way it is now. with the help of great team ofc.
without rules and boundaries, theres cerntainly no nice store. no wodner alot of other tea memebr came into my store and say its so neat. now i understand why.

saw my fren took up this makeup forever class thing months back... dunogot cert or wat kind. but anywya... saw her pics. .seems liek shes working for them now... doing makeup for gigs show event kinda thing. ..
then she commented.. doing what she love...

then... im kinda jealou... cos.. as gd as i am.. (oh ytd a lady asked if i wanna join their company... haha.. .anwyay) ... yea. ..i like this job.but i don love it. its not liek my huge passion for accessories.
and yea....

haiz. ppl say... chase after ur dreams.. but i duno how. and . .theres too much at stake u see.

haiz. .o wellllll see how life takes me then.

when u work for money, and youre not the boss, most lielly its not rrly the passon that youre after. ..

to wake up and being able to do what u love.. is the bes.t. after all.. .most of our lifetimes...theyre spend on working.. unless youre born with a golden spoon in ur mouth

jaa

kept in draft oops. . this should be when i was still on AL

was playing this conversation starter thing with my colleague the other day.
and one thing she said admired me about is that im strong, and like no matter how tough the situation is at work, or the times i cracked under pressure (yes my blody job is blood tough) , i always bounce back and nvr give up.

its thigns liek that i don notice, and having ur team meber complimented that great thing abt u is so.. amazing.
and i feel proud of myself.
i dunno how words get into other stores that im hardworking=.=
but im glad rm knows. my fren told me.
but yea. .its weird. and in a way i disliek how words gets around u know.
im not the type to go talk2 gossip etc. im just doing my own job. yea.
so iduno how in the world my hardwork gets to their ears. strange. ppls mouth i tell u. .but luckiy its a gd compliment

mm... so yea.

forgot wat others to say.. .as usual.

sighs. sianz going back to work.
=/
wat to do.

and i hurt my sole. so painful .1 chunk of skin peeled offT_T
i rememebr that time my hand cut by fan still got sammy help me.
and i made a mistake by not washing my wound before i put on plaster overnight. argh

anyway plaster is v bloody. eew. im having a painful time trying to walk =/

mata

sick few days =(

i fell sick
few days back

throat hurts... coughing.. .and recently i got a runny nose altogether.

so paiseh when meeting started, i was coughing so badly. arghhh
irritating

a customer even told me to get a day off. ha rm was there duno she got hear anot

but yea. today still so slpy and unwell. dread going to work today =(
didnt get much rest either. with stocktake going on etc.. and then meeting on my off day =) arghhh

thaat explains why im still so tird and slpy now .wish i coulde slp more =/
though its past 11am

haiz

anyway
will do my best today bah. though i rrly didnt feel like opening up my mouth and talk.
=/
haiz

kk.. gtg.
just a short blog. health hasnt been great lately. and no time to go for run cos just too slpy with all these super early mrg shifts. =/ 6-6 mind u. supposed to hav 2 hrs break. according to our law here. but think she duno. so i took only an hr break. andn claim the other hr on other day.
by the end of day, i was so beat up =/

mon helping with another stores stockatake.
then next day 8am again. just that its 8-6 cos not my off day .
sianzz=(

haiz... hopefully i wil lget well sooon bah.. .hoepfully sunday wont decide to see doc

jaa

breaking down

so this youtuber right... he's gay...  and he was saying he refused brochure from two girls (about jesus and stuff).. and as he walked passed them.. he heard them says.. he must be a faggort etc... he then walked back, and in no offense to christians etc.. .he said to them.. something abt jesus borned.. blah2... and they are whores. the girls looked shoccked.
and he just walked on...

like seriously. they mustve been paid to do this brochure.. if not. if youre a true blue christian, why would u judge and comment about this gay? (duno if he wore makeup when hes walking there)

my fren told me.. .theres this one time.
she sin her bf place right . no bra. and rrly wanna go toilet. so she just put on shirt. she and her fiance quite plump. but shes still ok looking.
her fiance younger broa nd frens were out in living room hanging out. she no choice but to go toilet. then one of his yohunger bro fren sorta give her that look. up and down look? and asked who is she. ur sis? then he say no its his elder bro gf.
then when shes back in her room sher overheaerd his fren saying.. 'mustve been nice to bang her' .then her fiance heard it and confronted his frens. and he tell his bro to let them get out before he step outta his room later.

i thin thats so cool to stand out for ur gf. so cool. rrly.

some man woulve pretended nvr heard it.

anyway...

and recently she was tellign me... how her bf been working  hard and kinda neglecting her la... cos he 's trying to earn more money for the future.  he also dun wan her to work when shes married.wan her be a housewife. (its her dream anyway ).. then it strikes me when she says(i think she told him) ..
theres no future if shes not there ( at the end) .
as in.. if u don love her enuff..neglated her..... .and she decided to leave, then there wont be two of them anymore anyway in the future.

stressed out abt work ne.

and night slp was pretty bad two nights before... lat night 3hrs slp so din exprience anything.
but yea...
couldnt tell anyone. .
think imma offer josssticks again tonight.

sghs

sad.
i don feel good at all at this point
yet  i nid to focus on sales..etc

haiz.. wha tto do. higer pay, meaning more work.

more stress

personal stress.. work stress... i hate it all.
im breaking down

mata

on bored AL

ok. and so.... i had alot to blog but i cant rememebr. .again =.=

ok so i wil ltry my best. meep.

ok so.. ive been sick at the wrong timing. whenim ono AL. =.=
runny nose and couching. .sore throat. .sobx

and i went uss with my family totally looking sick

mm... yea. was pretty bad actually.
and tat day my snapchat i think broke my own record. ..liek the logest post ever haha

2 days ago i think? i went... overboard at sephora online website. meep. like.. ouch. shouldnvet speend so much. but figured that since theres no holiday oveerseas, just treat it as a holiday shopping trip' but.. .yea. oh dear.

anywayyyy its those once in a v v v v long while splurge.

mm... i had so much fun cooking. its so awesome. ive cooked twice this week =)

mm.. duno what else to do... at hoe also bored sometimes. meep
sianz ne.
he also busy.
me just trying to find things to do bah

today had coffee.. and i feel so terrible due to caffine

huuu

mata

happy birthday to me

omg im away for long again eh meep

so.. wats been happening. .i try to kkeep up and remeebr k

recently had celebrated my bday . as usual very casual normal one. and as usual bros pressy will arrived late probably from online again

fren asked me out for dinenr . at first she tot it was over as i;d posted pics of my ca ke. but its a ctually midnight when i posted it. so shes liek yea. wow we celebrated together.

anywya thanks to her bah at least my bday is a lil diff. go home also nothing to do =/
and thought sammy will msg me happy birthday again whihc he usually does every year. but he didmt. we msg a couple during the night ...yea though wish for a ..more memorable one bah.

but anywy.. like that bah. so weird. bday over just liek that.
my colleague gave me a cbuoquet of flowers. i ddint know flowers can actually make me happy haha. smells so swt and nice.. .so pretty.
and happy colours makes me smile at the sight of it. =)
 though im still not a flower kinda girl.. but... yea. i dont hate it .
im starting to like them ..more=)

so my instore cd was playing brono mars 'when i was your man'
when i was listening to the lyrics.. its. .literally written for ppl who didnt cherish who they were with . like how he regretted not spending time with her etc.. .and now a new guy is doing all those stuffs with her. and he regretted it.
i havem watch the mv yet .but yea..
then coincidentally my fren was telling me how her fren wanna get ba ck to his gf cos he's the one who pushes her away first. cos he's busy with duno work or stuffs. and didnt have much time for her .so when she bring sit up times and again, he say its best for her to u know. go. and ifnd osmeone better. like in a gd way not a nasty ask her to go wya. so yea. now hes askin gmy fren if she think he has a chance to get b ack with her.=.=

my fren say not la. anyway im like. yea should tell him listen to brono mars 'when i was your man' .XD
perfect song.

last night i felt so sick =( huu. my throat sore and iim sooo thirsty. my nose runny abit. hopefully by tmr i will be fine. but tonight still gotta work =/

feel so unwell..

jaa mata

will do my best to post next post soon as im on al. yay... thugh ... .rrly wishes i could go syd.. .sighs=/
shouldlve bought the tix when it was on offer. .
sighss.. .

=/ o well.
but heard its so cold there now.

kk jaa mata

hit it off

worked with soemone new today.
chinese. and yea... not trying to be racist.. but somehow the hcineses ive worked with..is much better with... yea...

a poty shes not from my store.

oh yea.. .ytd went to expo food fare and robinson sale. walk2 look2..
just didnt wanna stay at home.. =/

today so slpy cos slpt late

so yea hit it off well iwth her right away.. cos chinese mah and someitmes one look u can tell if they are nice anot..

and yea.. everything was fine till. i was so awkward when her cousin a guy, came in with his gf. and shes like oh he says you look young.
then she slike guesisng im 22.. and blah3...
and since shes also quite comfortable with em she todl me her cousin gf like so rude. shes not that pretyt. and when she say hi and bye she slike give a v black bochup face.

for me im shy with strangers unless those u know .. few that at first sight u new youl hit it off with them kind.. anwya.. yea even if shy. at least i don show that kind of face to my bf frens.
the most i smile answer abit and yea.. but i wont give black face.

so...
i duno ba.
she say before she met her today she did asked him if his gf is pretty. he relpied no. and since they are form diff schools. she asked if she got stolen frmo toher guys how. he say don care then he find other girls.

we're like... erm... ok... maybe he's jsut not into her at all.

well he's just a teenager after all

rememebr that time i posted abt this blac k guy who just releases  a book.. and he was so poor in the past and hes now on ellens show... blah3..

then recently i read a product producer'' ceo story. and he was like working sooo many hrs per week even he's rich niow he still works so many hrs(omg) anyway.
he was saying education adn teacher wont teach u something2. its experience.

he quitted his stable high pay job. and worked out his own company. from a 5000 credit card loan and heaps of NOS from companies.. and working form a bbasement... he...is sososo rich and successful now. its a health product

anyway.

from slping on a matttress with his parents in a room.. to where he own his own huge house... the v movie exp type of looking room... yea

u can tell he rrly worked his ass off.

anywya... inspiring eh

kk... gotta go unwind myself abiit.. go youtube abit or somethng. ..

jaa mata ne

movie creepness

 ok. ok...  so. imma stop now ok.

i tried to snapchat couple of scences from insidices 3.

the horrofying clips .. but,... i tot it went through. .then it didnt... and my phone hanged.. and i need to restart it obviously.and,.. my wallpaper aint there anymore ..and.. .

its just wont send through its like... hanged

ok. coincidence eh.. ok. i keep telling myself that

i hurreid open my door up cos.. i don like this kind of... 'coincidence'

1 went through.. but i doubt i wanan try the rest.. =(((

anywya............

dang it thou

erm yea.

my colleague new fren.. came to our sotr erecently to purchase stuff.. .my col says her fren is crying cos.. her bf.. msg her wont be meeting her . even if she wanna tag along.. he will treta her as a dog tagging behin


OMG

for a muslim to syaa that???  wow bth me and colleague ..shocked.

i asked how long they bee ntogether she say few yrs bah

im like.. .. crap. she shld dumped him.
how can a man not respect a mown???!!!!

wat dog???


if u don wan her to tag along say so. dont desceibr her as dog!!

describe

and... sighs.. .=/ .feel so sad for her

 furhtermore.. her bf.. yea my fren sown me his puic. not handsome.

=.=

shes ok looking. but hte ugy is like crap. cmon... she don deserve him.

wth


 dog???


sighs..

kk. anyway still gonna continue watch my movie onlnie.. but yea the whole snap chat hting.. is too much of a coincidence.. .creepy

k.. itried again..and it didnt let me get rhough.. .wats wrong with snapchat?? or .. has it gotta do with my movei??

jaa
night

rude ppl from al ages

omg today had a weird bad dreaam.
was feeling rrly in my heaart .. sad and,... dunno what to do,

besides me theres other galsx too we got kidnapped or somehting..

and we  cant use phone omehow in drea i coul still use it whilst pretending to talk to my duno hwo...

and i was like hey im fine etc2... i knew the moment i stop, i will be serving hte men. os i keep tlaking... then i think i  alled myy best fren in dream? duno who she is.. i talk2... tehn whens theres chance i said. hinted gdbye or sumtin etc.. .and i was sobbing alrdy etc... and yea..

at hte end of call i cant tell her wher i am.. etc... just wish she could tell police...u know.. =/

so.. yea.. .and.. blah3.. .i woke up whne my alarm i sup.. i was so glad cos my dreams aint gd at all howle night

and yeya.

ppl att nex mall all so rude till i cn at take it no more i wen ttch' at some point.
stupid aunties.. etc

cos so croded.. but hey at least say ecuse me!!!

then when headin ghome my mum stopped and turn. she say this couple.. the girl bumpled into her hardly...so rude nvr say sorry... but my mus like. nvm. gd thingn when she bumped into her, she also bumped into my mumms mop pole. the pole hit her hand she says.

as i told ya guys before ... nowadas.. youngsters so rude as though they went into a babarian school

i was abit surprised when my m suddenlly stopped too.

cos i did a wtahat couple.

that girl and guy.. probably teenagers with heaps o makeups etc..

she wore a dress.(through my oneglance of her)
she was quite pretty with long hair ike korean or wat...
she was chatting loundly wit her bf in hand. like walking pretty fast...

even if she bumped into my my whislt rushing for god knows what... .she shoudlve apologize!

i dunoo.

i kst catn stand anyone ... anyone.. . to bully my family. (horoscope cancer spirit).. if sehs an auntie .. no education whatsoever.. i owuldve been.. ok... bear with it.. but her??? cmon nowadasy so many scchools... ..their students... ? .... .s**ks. manners downpoint.

fast motion i tot she looked pretty prettye... but maybe shes rrly ugly in upclose?
anyway.. eve if rrly pretyt.. that kind of action and heart... .pls. don.
u cant even compare to anyone else.

argh

haiz...

this human word now... =/

o well.. wat to do...

anyyway yea. irritaiting day...

many rued ppl..

huu

mata

eyes prob..night's a prob too

today.. night onwards kinda badlucky going with me.. =( so sad.. sigsh

and i totally missed out the fact that... im wearing lens for more than 15hrs =(((( my eyes red and irritated now =((

to tired and slpy to notice that bah. thanks to a meeting early mrg at duno where sentosa... somewhere near sg most exp hotel.
taxi driver say 2 tables two night stays is 10,000.
im like whoa... skali its near there. like a apartment. i duno. but its nice. and spacious. ..
not the hotel hor.
but yea its for a meeting. and yea. the so called office ... its there. =.=
wow.

anyway still a exp place bah.

and.. .yea. i keep thinking ok bear with 12hrs... wih the lens. but i miscalculated.. its more than 15=( i totally regretted that now=( sighs.. my eyes rrly bad = ( huu

theres just liek u know lil things that went wrong.

onwards

then omw back. this old man tap on my hand to indicate leg go of the pole cos he wanna pass.
bus not even stop yet.

liek the kind of no manner taps.

imm like ok. .liek what my mum todl e. sometimes old ppl like that its becos they had no education .
etc..
duno manners
so im pissed off. but i tell myself. .maybe he rrly.. u know no education watso ever in the old itmes...
maybe he's mute. maybe he's deaf?

so yea... but ..still alrdy sad.. still makes me more upset and frustrated =(

theres this black man on elllen show.

omg i cant believe i forgot his name=(

but he was saying how he was so poor.. homeless..and live in a car for 3 yrs.

lbut yet every mrg he wakes up and feel grateful to be alive and thankt his god for being alive 10mins every mrg.
then i duno wat happened... but he's rich enuff to be on elllens show.

and yea...

he wa ssaying... a man will not perish without education (he drop out of high school i think..he din complete it) .. but a man will perish without a dream.

im like. wow. blown over by that.

true thou

he reminded me of that guy in jurassic park.. that main lead character. .that guy trainer.
he also lived in van for like duno.. .2 yrs or how long ...3?

then he end up beocming famous. .

read this mag ha.. he was saying how he detest the celebrities trying to flirt and chitchat with his famous wife(when he's still not famous)... right in front of his eyes somemore.
anyway they are still together and hav a child now so yea dun worry haha.

but yea.

it all comes down to luck i guess... and nvr give up...and.. yea. u know. u nvr know whats gonna happen.

ppl say don do this do that etc.. .but end up.. u missed out some great paths

u knowo my sm... also due to her luck.. her pay is 4k. retail u know.

cos tat super store sales v v gd that time when not so many stores as of now..
she herself say yea she srrly lucky. but after that.. no pay raise liao.

shes says her bro graduated from uni also still lower pay than her.

anywayyyyyyyyyyy

yea. today im feeling down.

and..  i just dun understand why am i shedding tears over the same thing over again.

is this how one supposed to be treated this way?

i dun even know.

but yea...

so weird. how when i was looking through his photots and he msg..

may tmr be a happier day .
mata..

-wat am i even pining for...-

hiii long time no blog gomen ne

oh wow its been ages since i last blogged. cos.. u know. ... youtube and all... lazy to type hahaha. oopps.

anwyay... didnt hav much to talk abt i gues.s..

just wanan say hi everybody

and erm ... yea. just been so busy. recently went back at abt 2am again. rushing to end at 1am cos rm say its ok to leave earlier then changed of mind when senior rm wants to be tough' and say cannot leave earlier.
o well. watever.

recently went on online purchased. gosh shoudlnve.. .if i wanna go on my trip... but.. .see howba..

anwyay finally bought this brand of makeup brushes ive been wanting to try for the longest time!!
and today came my dress.. .soooo onice. wow. love it. though material wise. .i tot couldvebeen better.
nonetheless, it fits me, and its stunning .clubbing dress eprfect!

god knows when will i wear it haiz=.=

so difficult to wanna wear anything nice and dressup when ur partner is not in sg all the time.

made a mistake a work in mrg. .o wlel... =/ why oh why

mata

.

supermodels after birth bodies

soooo slpy11 =( booo huu

sorry been gone for quite some time eh. also forgot what to blog abt ..so much. =/

oopsy.

had a haircut. last week. few days back actully. at first i like it. then.. i realized... mm.. not so . i duno. perhaps hair too dry bah.
i duno im not used to the shorter bit of fringe. he chopped off quite abit

been trying to stay hea;thy. well. alil healtier ver last week. though i still have my fav food. like curries.. .rice.. etc.. .haha.
late night dinner. what to do. my working hrs is not easy.

oh... speakin gof which reminded me.. a lady asked me if im interested in working for her. she say somehtign abt. not massage. but its like full body something. duno isit slimming center or what. anyway i didnt check out their website. not intending to leave yet bah

so. my fren is pregnant. shes v young. 20yrs old this yr. but gd thign is her fiance loves her alot. and also dun mind having child with her. and he even asked her to move in with him (and his family) . so yea. i think thats v responsible for a man bah.
rrly wish them all the best. though my fren say her parents sure angry. cos her sis got pregnant when she was 17 (elder sis ) .her dad straight away bring her to abort.
but my frne is the kind whos not afraid. she say shes gonna tell her dad and mum. not to seek approval. the most kena kick out she will just move in with her fiance anyway.

i admired her dare to do attitude someitmes ha. shes wild la. she used to be even more wild. like slping with guys ard . till she met this man. awww..... =)
glad she met a nice guy. and yea. hopefully after she give birth.. .soon then get married.  will sure attend her wedding =)

i kinda envy that u know. shes gonna have a family of her own with a man she loves.. .etc.
naming her baby (she had the names ready since last yr). oh yea. they been together for a yr. but.. yea.
guess madly in love eh .

anyway.
i saw this youtuber. 6months or more? since she gave birth.. .she suddenly shows her tummy. its like a video to encourage women accept who u are. nothing to be ashamme or upset abt etc...
her tummy... gosh. saggy. rrly saggy.
it nvr occured to me shes pretty on the outside. u know. not fat. ..but... wow.
i duno. im quite shocked to see that.
at first she was fed up and all. then she realized.. .its ok.

and i was tellin gmy other colleague... i have no idea how victoria secret models (few of them are mamas alrdy with few kids!) can get back into shapes. like.. .wth?
through operations tug in or what??

somemore one of the vs model actually walks the runway after8 weeks given birth. like.say whatttttt????

her 2nd daughter btw.
u can tell her belly button like. .abit big? abit diff. but not that super ugly or what.
but her abs. flat and toned. omg.well her trianer says she workout like rrly intenesely. 2 -3 hrs twice a day. 7days a week.
can u do that right after u give birth??? wont that be damaging to ur body?? thats what i heard but i dunno.

that saggy skin scares me. gosh. but if one dya im ever pregnant. after birth, imma try out this whatever 7 days a week kinda hardcore routine. though ofc hers is like professional trainner who guides her to skipping and boxing. but yea.

wow. no wonder these models c an walk runway.

fastest record is actualy heidi klum. walks runway after 5 weeks giving birth to her 4th child. say what???

but she say she eats alot. and she watch what she eats very closely. shes healthy and shes partially  lucky .

omg.
like wow.

my fren abit fat la. like. . yea. so.. .hpefully she wont gain too much weight.cos shes hungry easily .=/ and kep eating. somrmo doc say don eat fried and oily food. mon she stil ate fried chicken and tue laksa. i look at her=..= ....
say what

anyway...

being pregnant cna be both a v v exciting and happy matter. .yet aat the same time. .gosh.. the pain level.s.. the body changes...and... ofc school feees..
those can be a real pain in the...u know what.

and yea. all the best to them. hopefully they will get through whatever they need to.
can tell the guy loves her alot. and is a gd man. so yea.. .shld be alright ba


ha.  all girls faces the same prob. she was telling me someimtes her bf say go toilet or what. then nvr reply her long time.
she wil lmsg him. u get stuck in toilet isit. lol.
sammy also. but im not like her i don say it liek that de XD lol. shes funny la.
then same. nvr msg her but can go like photos in other websites. shes like. .ye ala u willing to likeother pics rather than text her using 10secs of ur time. lol.

o well.

m.. i don feel so well. think its the med i took.. =/

jaa mata

family/relationship woes

so my fren of 9yrs..'s fren... he rrly like this girll alot. somehow his parents dislike this girl. (he's form a very rich family) ... and... they lived together for 2 yrs. or been together not living together. not sure.

then... this girl.. .(duno isit their plan or just the girl). she lied abt being pregnant to his parents. his parents ofc not stupid. asked her to test it on the spot. and duh. she snot pregnant. 

anyway. i duno he has this gf for few yrs now stil ltogether. duno he cheated on this currant one with that 2yrs relationship.. or during that 2 yrs relationship he cheated on her with the currant gf. get what i mean> ?

so i dunno which way round. 

but he confesses to his gf that time. cos he say he's not a playboy. and he dun want to be..=.= 

anwyay. 

so yea. then he saw this ex (of the 2yrs living togethe or being together)... and he was so pissed. cos he still has feelings for her. 

so pissed cos shes with other man. thenn somehow this girl keep popping nearby him. then she rejected the same guy shes been hanging out with. probably hinting that shes actually not with him . 

so that guy fren... like. duno. pretty upset. liek seeing her again. .. small world. 

and yea. 

im like. i duno whats their situation.. but. he's with his gf for few yrs now. 5 ithink. then now see his ex still acts up? 

liek. ..who is the one he love? 

wouldnt it be unfair to the girl he's dating now with? 

i duno bah. im just curius. but im not close with him so i cant and shouldnt ask much. 

o well... 

so yea. forced to let go of that girl? cos of parents? 

could it be cos she's a **tch? 

or.. shes from a lowdown family? or simply the fact his parents want him to marry a higher status girl form a higer class gd family? 

all these i wouldnt know ofc. 

but.... yea. 

just hope he'll be fine bah and don bump into her again haha. 

jaa mata

movie time

was so yearning to watch insidious 3!! torned betwene another movie too.

ahh.. .that australia poie... finallhy get to eat it again today=) 

mm.. . so yea. frustrated my item delivered whilst im away. ==. arghhh now i have to travel somewhere else to get it. 

sianz

definitely ytd was feeling better. today still .. nah. okok 

guess i still gotta work on relaxing myself=./

wonder what sammy is up to whole day at uni without a word. 

duno. half the time i duno whats he doing  . 

ow ell

haven sortout my sephora spree.. slpyyyyy so lazy =( 

wish i could pull myself up and go for a run. and not be so slpy al lthe time 

and tired. and sianz

yup. 

o well. 

hopefully tmr will be a better day bah.

just msg him. and shoudlnt even had done that.
he always sya anything just msg. so now im msging . he tot im having probs? i said notin. its liek he don believe. liek he's angry cos im not saying anytin? liek wat...
i don even know anymore.

forget it . shouldntve msg.
shld just tell him next time he's busy remind me not to msg him at wrong timing.
thats why i like ot ask are u busy. ofc if busy i wont dis him .

anytin bah.

jaa mata

most amazing phonecall ever. =) saved my life

it was quite amazing. like how a phonecall from him... would just eliminate my stresses. like literally just halfway through the call . i was like.. i felt lighter'.. .relax... and tight feelings in my heart was gone. we didnt even talk much abt my stresses. i just say im stress etc. he din say much either. u know. then fullstop.
then .. .yea. soon after i realized im back to me again. normal! and.. i duno how that happened! i also watched him played game..through skype. so cool. u know how i like to watch my close ones play game. meanning my bro. and now him. so yea.

=)

its weird. like.. issues with work.. life.. trust.. all aspect.s. .suddenly.. just melted down.. all. im very grateful for him c alling. and happy. cos. todya i woke up. feeling normal again. happy. getting ready was  happy as well.. .u know

wow. wat a powerful magical phone call. though .. i duno how that happened. its not like we talked abt problems. .u know. we didnt. he just say don stress. etc. tats it. i didnt talk abt it either. last time we talked was even before i headed to syd..

but yea... so thankful for hm and that call .al li need.

if only that came earlier haha. XD

but anywayyyyy

yea!

and i went shopping at sephora todya . had a great day (not at work).. .so yea.

awesome.

wow. after so many weeks of.. hell?

3 new upcoming movies are coming up. i wanna watch 1 of them in imax. seehow bah


jaa mata!!

tytyty so much again.. .for that amazing phone call. though din tlak much. yet lil detaisl counts. .and watchign that game. .yea.

could it have been his voice?
i duno.

but yea. wow.

hopefully tmr onwards im still as normal.

mata

my lovely typical day in sydney =)

u know how sometimes when youre stress. .and u need to talk.. but u  didnt wanna affect the ppl ard u. cant let colleagues feel stressed dtoo when their leader is down.
or just afraid that they only hear u , but they dont listen.

sighs.

so stressed out abt every aspects of my life. these days i felt so messed up.
from work to personal. .stuffs u know.

and .. intially i feel like crying. but then i controlled cos was at work. now home.. wanted to cry while bathing.. but couldnt. duno why. maybe long day tired bah. somemore the moment i stepped in, theres more work to do. its nvr ending piles of work.

how to relax ar.... mm..

then holiday trip cancelled due to fren's new bf surprises her with a trip. i msg her today. and shes liek oh he just told her. im like thinking in my heart. .. long story short. she shld actually knew abt it perhaps at least couple days back. or even earlier.

so now. im stucked. i duno what to do.
shld i go somewhere else. my fren adviced me to go america. or somewhere alone.
im like jokingly asked. .u wan me get shot ar. haha. anyway.
yea. actually i just wanna peacefully go someone alone. do my thang. shop. etc.
i misses the times when im in my hotel room and my hand reaches out to the cold ouotside the window... and it was like aircon.. so cold. and it was raining.... i breathe in deeply the air... into my lungs.. ..trying to feel every inch throughout my body... i felt the cold and the wind blowing against my hair and skin....
its as though.. .im still there when i relives this moment.. .and some others bah. dun wan say liao.
with him also.

so yea.
though he's not free for me. but now i have this thinking... like perhaps heaad back to syd for a couple of days. perhaps 3 or 4?
cos hotel is exp... so probably i cant stay a week again like the previous time.

i duno peeps.
but yea that would mean i have to spend abt 100 over on transportation fee. cos back n forth mah. dun think he will be free for me ba

frens always asked me why don wan try elsewhere.

i duno. im alone. and besides the reason hes there la. .and syd is like my   '2nd home' close to my heart. and im getting used to the places.. .more of shops ha. just ard the small comfortable area i alawyas liek to hang out.
till now i still didnt get to eat the chinatown creme balls=.=
long queue!!! forever==.

anyway ya...
guess im jsut so comfortable bah... like. i know .. where to go..  what to do for the day. usually out of the one week i love to spend 1 long day shopping from qvb to meccas to westfield. haha. menaing.. .abt from 10ish or 11 head out .and shop all the way till 6pm. or 7pm. when headin back i have a habit of stopping by woolworths. cos its along the way. and yea. haha.
thast my typical long shopping day in syd XD

most stores are still there.. .but few of them.. no longer there liao=/
o well....

and bras n things. omg. all the way to bondi. luckily not that far. mm... i wonder if on my own.. will i be able to make it there without missing my stops... cos theirs is not liek.. .i duno. not v loud? and only announce the location once? or i duno. not when rching bah. forgot.
sg mrt is like when leaving and when rching will announce.
so thats gd

mm... oh. i remmeer. .when coming back...
this angmoh guy at mrt so rude. he was eating donut.( ikr... u can eat in mrt?? =.= i mean subway train... watever)

then he threw the paper into the rails!! wow.
so rude was that. =.=

haz. so yea. .anyway.. .im rrly considering that option. coupe of days in syd.. but i duno... i duno jjust yet.. .

i don feel like cancellign the al cos.. im rrly stressed out.
at this stage. so yea.

or spend it in sg? uss hotel? go uss on my own?
i duno man...
spending days in sg aint bad. i just duno what shld i do. i misses syd so bad =/
i ..might go back to same hotel T_T cos its cheaper abit.
though i gave them twice bad reviews liao.

and ive sorta memorised how to walk ard frmo there. XD

see how ba

but fo rnow... , yea. im rrly thinking abbt that(going to syd short trip_)

shall see how it goes bah.

haiz. or ask bro or frens...

i can start a conversation with cusotmer. a totla stranger. but with ppls frens. it can be a lil hard.

i duno.
my personaility is on the mm... multiple sides. ' XD

sometimes i envy my frne. bubbly personailities with everyone she sees.

then i remind myself. im diff. indiviual .everyone is diff.

i shoudlnt dislike myself for that..

this is me u know.

i cant even explain.. u have to get to know me.. to know me..

i surprises myself too with lame jokes and .. haha.

v funny la. XD not praising myself. but seriously i cna be v vfunny. omg. so lame.

and yea..
getting along with guys whislt chatting doesnt mean flirt.
i like to chat with anyone if they can chat.
but with girls they're so... i duno. i like manly' topics. i do liek girls topics.. but more on beauty products. makeup etc.cos thats where im stronger at. i know abt those.
but if tlak abt brandeds.. etc.. .this fashion. .this diamond..etc.. img like. wat?? oh dunno.

but if tlaked abt certain animes.. games or cartoons.. all guys type. .. i will be able to elaborate more on those. cos. liek i'd said umpteen of times. i grew up with my bro.

so yea.. .

but my guys and gay frens been pretty busy lately so yea.. =/

haiz.

feeling abit betternow...

tal next time bah..

jaa mata

unhappy and stressful day

and so its liek u know.. .such a bloody bad day for me. =(( im so stressed out enough. supposed to head out with fren. then last min say finally got job interview. blah3...

long story short. found out 1. she lied cos she didnt wanna wakey so early to head out  after all

2. she rrly overslpt for her interview. cos shes been slping 3-4plus am. and woke up at 2-3plus PM. in aftnoon.

so yea.

fine. u dun feel like going just say it straight.
no nid to lie.

sighs. anyway. nobody is perfect.

sianz. so decided to head out instead of cooking. need to get away.

and.. .just feel so sianz. only excited moment was when i encountered this ramen chalenge lvl spiciness .. so yea. i went for it. not tat spicy ba. it is. but not tat delicious

longstory short again. im so sianz i feel so stuffy inside. so stresed. maybe due to pms?

or its rrly due to work. cos ive still got hourss to clear. my ot.

sales perious ive been working more than 44 hours.
im so tired.

and since mrg been msging abt workstuffs.
like wth. its my off.

sighs.. .alrdy stress anough shoudlnve bother so much abt work. but as sm i must do it.

arghhhh gonna explode from inside out=(

unhappy =(

jaa

my country m

no tips today.

so my country manager pop by the other day... i find it easier to talk to her than the aussie rgm who alrdy left sg.
shes 34this yr. wow right. still quite young ne.
and she talked more to me .. .and she knwos abt my bf and i.. .cos she erm last year spooted me crying my bals out at the store. ha. .anwyay.

yea. sometimes she wil ltlak to me and ask me. so i feel more comfortable talking to her. i even commented on her vampire tooths lookalike . lol i like. XD

but ppl say shes v fierce though.. .when shes not happy. so far thank god ive not encountered that yet. nor with my currant rgm .
duno why. maybe they more lenient towards me. or my luck. hoepfully.

and yea.

she mentioned.. .she just ended her 3 yrs ldr with her bf overseas. he kept wanting her to go europe. but shes permanently based in sg. and he keep saying wil lcome sg. .but didnt. april supposed to come in the end still didnt. say cos of work etc.. she feels llike she cant trust him anymore. .like through her senses.. the thigns he did..  or wat i duno. she nvr say. but she just told me she felt liek she cant trust him anymore with watever he's doing outside..

so .. yea. she end it. and .. wow. she found a new love soon after. a french guy lol. based in sg permanently too haha. her fren hooked them upXD saying to the guy i think you're her type. then she created this chatgroup for them. my country manager wa slike... whatis this> ? lo. apparantly they msg... and meet when shes back in sg (cos she was in s africa that time ) .. .and they went out. ..been dating for 2 months now. aw.w. shes so brave. and im happy for her. =)

hehe

hoepfully iw ont ever see her angry ugly side . meep

and yea.

thats abt it.

i just find that i clicked with her more.
and. .. my rgm gonna chance soon.. .yea... .
and... this country manager ne..

she also can feel em ha.

ishe asked me hows days been cos she saw me 3weeks ago. ands she wa slike. oh yea. ..(todl her abt meeting bf frens) . she is too. like so shy and duno what to talk to ppl she duno. if its one on one shes fine. but when it comes to group she'll be quiet and shy. haha.

i guess takes time bah.. hoepfull one day i;; get used to it. though i still like. i don detest at all. jsut nid to work on the groups of strangers bah. in face one on one i can even talkl to the shyest person. haha

ja amata

remember this?

''don worry when they keep messaging u.. worry when they dont. ''

work woes / physicallyy and emtionally drained

no tips for tonight. .didnt feel liek it..

been so tired and busy like a crazy woman. totally broke another record of mine. took 1 and half hr only. worked from 2pm to 430am. yes AM. next time still work and im like living dead.
wow3. i slept at 6am as i was too tired.  i still rememebr this minah asked me if we nid pppl cos see me like in malay word ..'lepak' only.. like relax only... i told my colleagues too. they all wanna slap her also hahaa
beneath those glamours dress up theres so much sweats and tears k.
and physical mental tiredness cum sressnes.. .etc
but we get paid for all these work.. .at elast worth it. but still.. .

haiz.

its rrly2 tough job.  both mentaly and physically.

mm.. todya i got fered an office job by my custoemr cos she liek me. and she think im pretty .so ppl will come to me. i duno what business la. notin bad .shes a nice auntie.
last night and today i got ppl telling me imvery good. and they like my service =) yay.

and oh the auntie with another auntie.. like older one. ..they were asking if im attached.. .the older one asked.. .not her mum i think.. .then this younger onoe say.. ofc she has one la. guys queue long queue duno who to choose only. .soemtihing like that .lo.. i duno why i get the impressin the older one like trying to ask for her son or grandson.. or wat. i dunoo. luckily the auntie help me by saying i hav. i din even have a chance to say anything lor

so yea. nie customers todya bah.
mostly

duno what els.e. ust been dead busy and tired. .
and dealing with emtional stuffs. ..
lies.. distrust. .dishonesty.. deceit
deja vu..
history repeats itself...

so tired.

when you solved the prob and given the answer. why are thigns happening making the same mistakes again??

forgotten.. memory los.s. or taking advantage.

i also had a talk with my asm todya. i got to.
i cant accept them keep saying forget or overlook... not when she does it for like weeks.

so much going on.

both physically and mentally im tired. mostly due to work. adding on to the pressures.

o well.

jaa mata..

may i not dream of work again as i did today...

light sleeper

mm... so slpy. im such a light sleeper . no matter how tired or slpy i am, once im awake, its quite difficult to calm my thoughts down.
=/

tats why be it holiday.. or off dyas.. im still so tired and slpy

this cab driver was tellign me. how. this young girl was left drunk alone by her frens. in the bush. near roadside. this stranger. picked her up and get into cab.

thankfully this girl manages to wake up halfway through the trip to hotel.
shes still drunk and keep asking wheres her frens.. .she wanna go home.
then after she gets off the cab. driver ask the man. u dun wanna send her up? he say. no. tats nt even his fren. he just saw tat shes drunk and wanna get her into hotel to 'rest'. =.=
he even say to driver. something like. dang it. so wasted she actually woke up!

omg jerk!!
but what to do. when youre with fren swho doesnt  c are abt u.. and youre a girl ..and you wanna be so drunk... tats what happen if youre down on ur luck as well.

he also say his passenger. .young girl also. was so drunk that even after 30mins of calling her to  wake up, she still couldnt wake up! he had to call police. omg. ...so paiseh =/

then yea. he was talkin aalot lol .say girls shouldnt drink so much.
ha

recently i wactedh this tv show. eh. i mentionoed before isit??

abt how photos got shared ard etc... and this girl was raped becos this man saw her pic or wat saying .. .shes alone at home now.. .or something etc.

scary huh.

but he say luckily singapore is sae. if malaysia or wat . at night time ppl fight. ..drinking and raping.. etc. v dangerous now he say.

gosh

ive been so busy. adn .. .so so much work.. =/ im tired.
high pay. .more work its fair. but.. sometimes. u get so worned out. my clleague also say the same thing.

wish i could fall aslp now.
but my mind is always thinking

its hard to.. belive .. nowadays...

*shakes head.

haiz. o well.\

my f ren.. haiz.. 4 yrs n half.. with her bf.. then cos he neglated her... eetc... she started a new relationsop wiht othr euy.. for few months. bu tdue to his job... yea. thye are not toghete.r hes coplaining.. 4 yrs n hlaf. ..hse had a peaceful life eve thoug at imes she snot appy with him.. but wiht this new guy.... she cnt clivck with his hokkien spekangin ffrens.etc..

me and my fren still support her ex. rather she don go bac ot the new find.



so ya rrly hope tat she wll be fine soon
talk next time. jaa
mata

tips:

86 laugh at her jokes and humour

87 verbally say thank you when she does thigns for you

88 notice when she gets her hair done and give a reassuring compliment

89 don answer the phone at intimate moments or if she is sharing vulnerable feelings

90 create special time to be alone together

tips left with 10more only.... =)

hectic week

kinda glad br is gonna be home ate due to stocktake .

meaning i can slp eaarlier abit yay.

so slpy.

so much work to be done this week. and yea. its crazy .

the worse yet to come. can twait to get over the sales period. = /

ha how nice if im on AL when its sales period.

sighs.

just hope.. eevrything will be ok.
been upset ..

oh ya it was  great to shop at sephora using my voucher annd bros discount . makes me forget unhappy stuffs for a moment there

jaa mata

invisible me

...was jsut getting.. tearly and uunhappy abt how.. if bro is coming back home for dinner. .mum wouldve heated it up  and warm up the dishes.. .it just dawn on me suddenly...  so he's not back for dinner.. and ..
u get the drill.

dishes are cold..

i don blame her.

im just wondeirng if she'd forgoteen abt me.

bro is nice. oblah3...

i almosy wanan say this to my bro.. oh u din come home for dinner. so she left the dishes cold..

i always accepted it doesnt mean i will feel its fair to onlhy heat it up when br is ocming back home for dinner!


am i the bad one

just be fair. tats all im asking. but humans.. they tend to forget u see...

im here. im still here. ..

am i not imprt as him?

same question goes to other him. am i not imprt as the others in his life.

subjects. life. family . job.

perhaps ... u know. good girl gone bad.

tired. so so tired.
nid emotional support. ... nid suppport more than ever.

didnt hav a chnace to talk to him.

anwyay tlaked to my frne.. shes also like.. .nah. the surprise tix part..
seems abit weird. suggested better not to meet again

so. am i to lose a long time fren again?

i duno. .


though feel unsafe cos. dislike he used to witchcraft n all...

sighs. see how bah.

phonw is thre forever. for now

i just nid the truth.

jus tell me.

jaa

weird surprise

i worked. 16hrs. like bam. total new record.
next day i was in mrg. still with tummyache into toilet trips.. i slpt only 5 or less hrs. and work again. my body aches so badly. yet more unepected work piles on more

so weird. thought im supposed to meet my fren with his sis . and then i couldnt make it. and then. he revealed that its ok. anyway he wanted to surprise me with 2 horror movie tickets 1140pm show. but yea. he gave them away to his bro.

im like.. what?? surprise?? so long nvr meet alrdy... then.. .yea. i don see the need for surprises from guy other than my bf. O. so that comes to me alot more weird. than surprise. =.=

thank goodness i couldnt make it. and whatveer happen to his sis. tot shes joining us.

ok. guards up. err.... ery weird. i duno. do u do that with ur bestie.

or even say i miss u?

like.. its all so .. mm.. creepy to me lol.

i duno man. so weird.

anyway. gtg go.

my body is aching ad i need rest n slp early soon or asap

jaa mata

still sick sucks

so i recalled.. literally i did told him that if i coulnt conta ct him in anywas i will head straight to the hotel .
then that day.. i tot i was worng. but actually.. i was rrly going towards the actual plan. .

u guys. do not take cab in syd unless u have to.
thank goodness he's a nice indian man.

im still sick. my collegaue asked me to take mc tmr. but my ceo is coming. and.. having just got back from holidays. .plus alrdy mc one itme... then off the next... i rrly.. cant bring myself to ask for another off.

=/  my rgm woudlve been unhapy about it.

sighs

feeling slightly bette.r yet the med still makign me kinda weak and slpy all day long as usual.

sammy is busy at work today so yea..
mm.. im kinda nervous abt tmr. beore my collegaue arrive will i be rushing to the toilet.
thank god they aint coming in the mrg.

im still soso missing syd... =(

ha. my weather app is still in syd haymarkets mode.
and im missing the weather there.

watched this ch8 show. abt this couple 45 yrs together married.. .
and.. .her husband now on wheelchair. not gd with words romantic mushy words etc. but their grandchildrens etc say he's actually romantic. even thoug he say no. his son say hes a hero to him. once his mum say theres a stalker at bustop there.. .next day. his dad accompay his wife to the bustop with a club. (the club pole) . to the busstop.
its nothte big thigns that rrly mateer ost someitmes the small lil thigns... thats what makes itmost romanti n sweet.

their grands says.. the ppl unlike nowdays ppl who always divorces. .

they are actually more commited. once they chose somone, they will stay commited for life.

which is true even for my pareentcs. my mum suffrs alot form his sibilings and his drinking ways..
but shes still with him
and yea.. .u just stay commited. true love nvr die. but why now ppl... o well.

u know.

kk

gtg.

jaa mata

butt watertap =((

remember the night his frens came into our hotel room, and they talked so long.. i rrly enjoyed listening to them, its funny and enjoyable. and sammy was saying his fren say its gd.
so yea. was so nervus when sammy suddenly say that. but yea its a gd thing nonnetheless im relieved.
im not much of a group talker bah.
but i rrly enjoyed their presense. especially with sammy .

so last night i was freezing. and yea.. .middle of night i started heading to toilet. everything out is water.

it was terrible. i could see dark circles under my eyes now. from 430am till 830 i couldnt slp so i headed towards the doc. and when i was walking back, my vision is getting black.. duno how to describe this but yea. i was like almost so close to blacking out. so scary. thank god i managed to rch home. phew.

probably caught it from bro.
so yea. im sure i went to the tilet over 50times. or a hundred maybe?
i sued up more than 2 rolls of toilet paper.
and each time im out i nid to go back within secs.its that terrible of a night=(((

i also have a fever. hence the reason why im freezing shivering and yet sweating on and off.
huuuuuuuu

i hate this  =(

i only pray i will be fine soon.

today is my first time ever mc. i was so hesistant abt calling my rgm. thank god theres ppl to do closing.

haiz. anyway... kk gtg have somemore med bah. one more pack  to go.
bro bought some food. perhaps he felt guilty.
im so weak now. can onlly slp and slp . all the time in bed so weak...and so out of place.
tmr sianz still nid to drop by store get store key. =/
huu

jaa mata

tc peeps

sat night back to work=(

my replacement manager was telling me. that the store opposite us levis, theres two guys. and they likeme. they were asking her who am i. where am i . cos i was in syd then. she knows them cos its her previous workplace

and.. yea. they told her im very pretty.
=.=
i told u right. somehting is wrong with that store i sense it when i walked past the other day many weeks back and this chinese guy was calling after me. but thank god i hav phone with  em and i pretended i nvr hear.

i tot she heard abt me and bf form my  colleagues. then we were tlaking and shes like. youre so good! im like what O.o she say youre so good. u have so many guys after u but u remained faithful and good.
im like. aww.. .thank u =3


mm.. .i had a bad exerperience last night .i woke up startled. too me couople of secs to realize whats happy. im taking it as im too tired. etc.. so yea.
its pretty horrifying=( just had joss sticks put up again.
i rrly don like what i heard  =(

its nice that sammy asked me to post pic for him of wat i wore. ha. he still rememebrs huh =) lil things matters

so this replacement manager. told me my store is very organized.
=) as a sm, i am v proud to hear other sm complimented on that.
v proud. =))

and this small dangling easily tangled necklaces, apprantly i heard form my team my rgm who just went back to syd=( .. she complimented that its the best looking vm she's ever seen in whole of sg.
omg. wow3.
im rrly proud of my team. and the long hard way we've come through.
like so wow.
amazing.
all these trainings for them. strictness... firmness etc. it all pays off.


i was freezing. omg . its crazy. the moment i stepped into the train, i was freezing. and shivering. bus as well... and came back home straight away head into bathroom...
still so cold. still shivering.
i have no idea why. sg now is supposed to be v v hot at least it still was coupe of hrs ago before i end work.

i must not get sick.
i cant. mc is like a .. .crazy thing to do at my company. no one dares to mc. usually ppl still come to work. my precious company as well.
rgm will just ask  u to ocme cos noo replacement.

so far. . im proud to say ive yet to get any mc at all.
uh huh. sick still work crazy huh ha.

today it dawns on me that. ..hey. so weird. but im back into the one meal a day routine =/
not like i wanted. but cos due to work y aknow..

and.. omg.
i was dreading it when i woke up =( me so dun wanan go.
was tryign to seek advice from sammy.. but.. i duno. well. gusy sure took it pretyt cooly and lightly.


huuu.. freedom no more... ut anyway... ha my fren pounced on me when she saw me.
XD at door step lol. literally

mm.. thats abt it then... 3am sammys time and still no answer....


but shall see how. been going to toilet so many times just now=( stomach not gd.

thsi gdlooking lady she came into our store. i duno why. it seems to me that she didnt like to make eye contact when tlaking. she was loking at the table or sideways.. etc. her face is definiltey fake. her nose lips and eyes. its v obvious she got work done to them to look like korean. so i duno if shes a popular blogger? is she inferior? like afraid ppl can tell she got surgeries done to her face. ..i duno. just find that kinda pity i guess=/
u shld be happy if thats what u wanted to do. but why no confidence now?
i duno. just  yea. .kinda .. wasted bah.



mata

missing my man

besides my frens... u know id blog before how they said they don swallow their patrnets u know what.

adn this youtuber. shes known for her ranchy .. .erm. fake big booobs.. .shes fat. ..etc. like slutty.. .i watch her cos shes still v funny nd ya. i know its like hard to explain why am i stil l watching her. lol. anyya. even she's saying. she don swallow. im like. oh rrly. my first time and everytime ive been swallowing .. i wonder... 

am i doing a wrong' thing? 

its healthy. it tasted alright and tastless for the past couple of times. which im like yay for. but... yea.. .

i duno. 

most girls wont ddo that? 

was telling sammy.. over lucnh.(cos he asked)  this angmoh guy was checking me out when i was checking in. 

my fren is the one who todlme. u know me. i on look at guys. like duh im not blind i can see them. they are angmohs. bigger bodies. etc. but i don stop n watch them. so anwyy. 

no wonder he stopped abit. i say sorry. i nvr look at him 

but then my fren tells me that he was checking me out and do thte.. erm clicked tongue sound? 

omg. im like what. =.= seriously? 

anyway not interested too bad==. 

i duno if its normal. but im jus tnot interested in gusy checking me out. it bothers me. i only love it   when he's checking me out. u know him. =) 

and i wa stellign him as well. .smamy. abt reecent met with my bestfren. adn he brought along his fren. i hate it when he does that! cos its like alwaysvr telling me beforehnd=.= !

anyway.... blah3 onwards... and at the end of night his fren and i were hitting off. and i kinda felt bad for not talking to my fren u know.. cos we were tlaking so much. 

adn anwya he suddenly shoot (btw guys.. .he is attached so ya. don think anything wrong ok .. ) 

me thsi question abt dc vs marvel .i was liek i dunno who i support . cos i watch literally everything. 

and i like them all .

i was nt too sure where they are from. 

adn he was lie .choose carefully woman. im like XD 

lol.. 

anwyay. so. ended up he like batman.. .etc balh3. i was like yea etcetc. cos im not a huge fan. and im no expert in these heroes. but i know some details. 

he didnt tell me he liek batman. he jsut say i shld wath the trailer. batman got so much money etc. i was liek .yea. h'es diff. cos hes hte only hero who is without the super power.he is just a human. and so on the conversation goes... with through the movies and cartoons..etc... 

lol. 

it was nice though chatting with ssomeone who knows what youve watched and stuffs. 

he was hten liek. you're the perfect girl! he said that twice. i wa slike... (holy crap dont ) .but i took that as a compliment. .and i was like immediately replied him that. .well everyones different... 

cos he was sayig other girls he know is watching stupid lame korean drams etc. 

so  ya. tats why for me who has watch 'men' kinda c artoons, is impressive to him i guess. 

its jsut a compliment nothign more. im sure;. 

if he's single i will feel v uncomfortabel .but he is attached so tatass why im ok to speack with him. 

i watched al lthese due to influence of my brother i guess. and yea. 

i duno. liek i'd said before. i watched and played games of not women normally does. 

cos of my bro. thats why. from games.. ff..iron man.. omg u namme it for me.. .

i love watching bro playing games. 

since young. even towards horror like silent hill... 

resident evil.. 

most women will be like.. eeww.. .omg scary.. so not cool etc. but ifind them so cool  so interesting. .so wow. 

so .. ya. alot of my interestes.. actually..got inspirede by bro... 

anyway.. .

yea. its always a huge compliemnt when a man tells u that youre the perfect girl. lol. i wouldve take that a wron way if he is single. but phew. hes not. so yea. menaing even if my frne ask me out again with this new fren i will be fine. 

i duno. what ur define of a perfect girl ?

girl who watches guys stufss? adn don go gargar over korean dramas etc? 

im  so glad im not that kind of girl though. 

not becs i wnann be perfect' ..etc. but just i like to be diff. 

like. i don wanna go gaga over lee min ho.. over.. .what.. big bang> ? orean gay looking group. etc. 

omg. they are so disgusting lookign with the hairs..bodie...eyeliners... argh. eat mroe !

voice sucsk. dancing alright. 

but yea. i duno why women going gagas over them .

seriously though. whyyyyyyyyyyyy

im a woman. i can be girly to mature to firm. v firm with my team. im fierce as well. 

but im mostly girly into a surrender mode when im with himXD omg why... lol

anwyay.. 

whatever. i just don wnana be define as a normal typical woman. 

like. i look at the womens with angmohs in heels..etc...lauhging away.. .im like. ..... are u so desperrate into angmohs> 

?
=.= argh shrughs

this book im reading now.. jsut statted only.. he

s 35 when he got retired baby!!!! say watttttttttttttttttttttt

he says whenevr ppl was lie talkign everybody has a mentor in their lives. he sliek yea. but he dont. then hewas like tlaking.. ..actually he realized he does. and thats his wife! awwwww

so yea. 15mins into his retirement. .he

s bored and wonder. why. why he's so suc ceessful. he wanna now shares the tips. to ppl .how he achieved all these. 

so yea. omg. he started from scratch... from owning his computer souftward company.. 9(though his comp) ...etc.. .till he sold his company. .etc.. .

tats why hes able to retire... etc. 

yes. u can do it. anyone can. gdluck=) 

tips :81 ask her how is she feeling 

82 if she has been sick in some way, ask for an update and ask how she is feeling or doing

83 if she is tired offer to make her some tea

84 get ready to go to slp together and get in bed at the same time

85 give her a kiss and goodbye when you leave

85. he spot on. sammy did that. sat mrg. fri night we slpt so late..at 530am after clubbing. 

he nid to get out and get his car. i was like.. aww..he's dressing up n leaving. .then he looked at me  and natural reaction i pout adn kisses me . before he left. like a peck on my lips. its as though the eye contacnt though. befoure i pout our eyes met adn he is alrdy coming towards me. that one sec only. so  ya. im so happy he did. 

and slp together in bed same time? omg. yea.... im loving that with him .full on pointssss

i rrly love that. 

so ya.. missing him lots still.. .haizz..

oh ya  thres this bbras thingy he was saying. .cheat. lol. its like . f  threres notin gto cheat i couldnt even cheat
 XD

anywya. its lik.e   i do . i only buy bras due to its desigsn. end of story .
i will take out the boot' if its takable.
and yea.

the insominia.. .she was like.. oh ono padding u don nid big sie. ...im like.. ok...=/ then i tried.. and i tel her.. .its too smal=.=

hey small built asian girls .and when short. doesnt mean u hav small ubst! so ya, i ask her to change a bigger sizr for me.
cos ven though im wearing a tshirt doesnt mena they can tell what size i am .

so ya. 

ja amata

another blog from syd im so proud of =))

i duno how. i duno why. my bro. he lightly touches me, like poke me, literally poke me v v v lightly.. and i get bruised days after.

i found this out ater coupl eof times i was like. hey when did i get this bruise? then i realized its my bro. =.=
then he will jokingly not liek previous times he rrly pressed harder. ..now he jokingly press/poke my thigh. and i still get bruise =.= ...im like. wat....
how the hell..

i rrly3 like the plasters sammy got me. i shoudlve bought it before i left. =/ it was that gd. best ive ever used.
must note that down in my july list.
though.. .its so difficult now. cos.. .the dates he might be free, alrdy been booked by my colleagues. so ya.. .see how it goes by.

so.... i was watching this youtuber.. she got married last yr.
her bf proposed to her on a hotair balloon. hha. nawwww

anwyay. they were togeether since 15yrs old. they've been together for 13 yrs .

she was giving tips on realtionships.

she said (between them as couples imprt tips)

trust

frenship

effort

effort and trust equally important u cant do without one and the other

respect
dont treat them jsut as gf/bf. treat them as someone special (as a special person)

make time. movie . date night.
twice a week. same place. second other day

effort is when u make time.

omg. when she said that. im like. on point. EFFORT IS WHEN U MAKE TIME. =)

even if u dont wanna watch the movie that ur partner is watching, just watch it anyway as u know your partner wanna watch.
she say most of the time she rrly hate hte movies his husband is watching. yet. she still watch it with him.
i totally agreed with that. if sammy wanna watch a movie im not interested in, i will still watch it. oh ya. liek the instellar. i liek space. i wasnt sure whats that. but i fell aslp . becos im so tired slpy n he is so omg comfy.
i wont fall aslp cos movie is bboring. unless im freaking tired.
even the hero 6. its so nice yet i think i fell aslp for abit. thank god not a long time.
so ya. as long as he is happy. i will be glad to watch with him at all times=)

do you still do the things you used to do when you first got together?
put in effort

be realistic.

watched too many movies? abt sex, abt proposals, abt surprises? DDONT be fool  by movies, dramas, porns,  etc....

valentines day.. dont expect to have a new cat/ chocolates/ flowers and teddy.. .
the higher expectations...the mmore youll get disappointed by ur partner

dont set any. no expectations.
expect nothing.

and do not compare. between other couples n other celebrities.
dno say... oh u see this couple of my fren.. he did so n so for her.. she did so n so for him.. etc etc.
do not ever ask. ''how come you nvr do that??''
omg i can imagine. that will hurt so badly=(
it will only make ur partner feel shitty =/

she got heaps of compliments from her fans and frens saying oh how perfect u two are as a couple eetc... (before htey got married)

she said. again. u duno what happens behind close doors.
many times they were rpping ea ch others hair off.
adn there were many times where they nearly breakup for good.

omg

so shock right. but hey thats a normal couple.
every couples bickers. gets mad. etc etc.

like at the bar. sammy askded me orde rdrinks. this man took me over. and i have no experience at ordering drihnks frmo club whrer its dark nosiy n iduno u hav to shout across or get their attention especially when im short et.

i was trying to be polite n queue. and that man. o well. ..then sammy quesiton me . .then ya. i know he was just asking. .but i .. got a lil upset cso he asked me twice.
then he ended up thinking im angry. i told him im not. i rrly am not. just abit rustrateed. but not angry. then ... i think he felt angry> ? id uno .cos after getting dinks. .he walked away simply to his frens leaving me behind his trails............
=/

have i shouted too loud due to music ? then he tot ima angry with him>?  i duno...
anwyay.. its over. and .. .ya. .
i love hugging him behind his back when he's brushing. and i still love the fact that he still transfers his halfchewed bubbleteaballs into my lips whenever he kisses me(whislt drinking it) .. .
lil things liek that im so grateful and lucky for.

today as usual. im missing him soso mcuh. you wouldntve understand.
he's working. .and he said he was having dinner.. .now 2hrs plusplus passed he still ahsnt msg me.. .but. ..yea im guesssing he ko in bed.. .i understand though. .rrliy wisehs for him to get mroe rest n replenish his energy

though last sat i was kinda wishing to go to his fren's bday party to meet his other frens. but i udnerstna we are both tired. and  he's worried abt his frens abt . .erm.. well.. .jsut. ... not the kinda of frens htey are as his other 2 frens he shown me.. .if that make sense. he was telling htem they are not liek them.. and yeaa h e don rrly wan them to meet me. .so ya but i know he is trying tobprotect me. :).. .

anyway...

im still missing him so mcuh. ,and yea..it sure aint feel gd.
my heart.

for a man, i think maybe with his hectic lifestyle. he might be able to take it better> ?

but fo rme... .im taking it quite hard i think.
and my heart still trying to get over the fact that im in sg now.. .

2015.. i can say for sure. highlight of the yr. in syd. with him. though only few days. though i see him slping all the time.. .yet. every secs counts. every secs is so precious to me. i held onto it so ever tightly n preciously (new word again)

i cant wait to be on the dance floor.
soemtimes u jsut nid to release the wild cat lol .
safe that its=.= with trusted ppl.

though i couldnt dance with hjim liek i wanted to... but ya.
i get to drink withhjim and all. .so yay.

i wwas... oh ya tot of this. i was walking towards him in club at my first toilet trip. i walked out.. and i was looking ard a sec and i saw sammy.iw as smiling n walking towards him. then from cronder of my eyes i saw this angmoh man like literally smiling a tme almost moving towards me. liek for a se he moved his body. thank god i alrdy found sammy.
O.O

i rrly had a fun ngiht with them. so what f music sucks. i stil  rrly enjoeyed that sat. that sat of my lift of 2015.

still im praying his frens not hating me. .. cos i thnki might hav a phobbia alrdy.

my frens asking me why u know who disliek me. cos they all like me so mcuh . and my   aunties customers liek me also and wnna intro me to their sons etc. =.=
so ya ... i ahv a phobia now.. .kinda. not a phobis that serious.. but just worried.. .wil lthey disliek me cos i tlak lil .cos im so shy . .not liek western country so open etc...


haiz. se ehow ba.. mahybe i shld ask sammy.. he jut replied my msg

im just not that gd with warming up to ppl i just met bah..

liek id said. i can totallyy do fine with new team emmebrs etc. and
if im one on one with stranger.
with groups.. that might not be my forte.. but wiwth one on one. i cna definitely tlak more.

like when im with his fren gf in hotel .
i asked her abt sg and countried she visit. i ask her to lower the aircon cos it might get hot cps it was freezing tha time and i on it and she said yea its fine. (though sammy questones me twice like i nvr tell her..and im to blame.=(  ) ...abt roaches be  careful..

with his f rne rob he asked abt sammy and me.. i coudl tlak more but cos music is loud and sammy is getting drfinks. .i duno kinda afraid when he's back will he think why ami chatting up with his fren so much. i know dilly right but still i worreid. lol

and his chubby fren the funny guy. todl me abt how he dislike xlub getitng into quuee and drinks cos etcetc.and i was ike. on point. i totlaly udnerstand and i 100% agreed. haha.

oly wish i have more time to talk to them and get ot know them .



jaa mata.

wish me luck peeps

loving this blog. power. look back and appreciate your love now.

yes. i shoudl rrly try to control myself from watching horror movies. not helping when insidious 3 is coming soon. and god knows if its coincidence or what... i watched the trailer last night .and.. .i had nightmare last night .twice at that. continous  someomre= (

sammy wouldve said it. .i tod u so'' .

it was a rather horrible one. im trying not to reall it. but i rememebr that it was rather real? i duno.. .and... its abit like nightmare before xmas boogie man.. .meaner one. .and i woke up. frightended.. .soon i fell aslp and i dreamt the same dream again. something like tat. i just r ecalled this.

sammy suddenly skype . i was rrlhy surprised and yet v  v happy. anad excited. but he couldnt talk much due to his location. and i was trying to think of what to tlak abt.. and. .yea. haha. =) then phone cut off. cant reach him etc.. .then y.ahrs later he's back in msg.

and so... i think im guilty of.. u know how. ppl  took for granted. of lil thigns ur partner done for u. no matter how hard u try to appreciate every single lil thng.

still. no one is perfect.

and.. .i was watching this bf tag video. from this youtuber. and. i was so blown away. like how. swt they are. and how he kisses her on her cheeks(not on lips cos she had lipstick on) multiple times. i was like aww... so swt.and so touching. iw as like. how come this  looks familiar to me.. .

then it dawns on me that. last week. more of i recalled on the clubbing friday night. sammy he kisses me on my cheeks couplel of itmes i think.

and ruffles my hair too .couple of times.

instead of thinking.. don kiss my blusher off my face or don make my hair a mess..
i shld be rrly grateful of the fact that. he's willing to do that for me.

this is a great example of .. .how even though i rrly do myst best each time. ..to make him happy. .to be the best i can for him.. to appreciate him.. there will bound to have times when. u know. humans aint perfect.

 and im so so ggrateful to've watched that vidoe. cos. that reminded me of how lucky i am. though im so touched and into tears somrmeo haha. ..by watching their lovey dovey actions.. .

im so happy that i had a bf who actually does that kissy on my face too.
if theres a video videoing us, i wouldve gone awww too.

and ya.

i just sent him a msg as well.
telling him how i appreciate the lil thigns he done.

u know. who  cares. i don c are. if he messes up my hair or rub off my makeup. or wwatever. hes my bf and he c an do watever he wants=)

and . im a lucky girl to deserve his love of actions.

im rrly happy when especially he holds my hand and hug me and rest on the bed in forn tof his frens.
that to me, is rrly... yea. a great feeling.
for a man who aint afraid to show his love and affection for his woman in front of his mates.. .is well worth a praise.

that to me alone, is a mega plus points.

so ya.

agina. im so thankful to watch that vidoe just now. and im so thankful that countless of times the way he loo atm em stare at me and smiles at me.. ruffles my hair. touches my cheek with his hand... etcetc.. .

im so grateful for all those. and yea. i rrly2 appreciate the lil thigns he done fo rme.

and im missing all that right now=(( sobx

so yea.

think back now.

and look at how you mightve missed out o loving the lil thgins which your partner had done for/to u

appreciate those lil moments in life.
cos ppl are pining for it. and they may nvr get it in life no matter how rich they are. how much money they have in their bank.

no amount of money can buy u true ove true feelings true affections. .

so yea.

be v grateful.. treazsure and cherish the moennts  u are having with ur partner now.

and dont...ever let them go. .

u wouldnt wan them to show these affections to somebody else now would u...

just watched another vidoe. yea i just edited this. again.

this youtuber spend 7 hrs time at this workshop creating this new wallet for her husband.
there are times like this i wishes i could done for him. lil htngs. big things.. but. .due to family restriction.. i cant send him anything etc.. .and so yea...

its so touchign to watch that . cos. i wouldve done the same. and i understand why she did that.
she was saying her husband was questinong her.. .where is she going.. why so long out... lol. omg. is he suspecting her?? haha.

anyway yea....  things that we don get to do often...will onlhy make us treasure.

3am now... gosh. ...wish he's here. .and why am i still watching youtube lol

jaa mata

no tips tonight. tired.

gomen