hmm…. lets see.. these past few days huh. … things happened… … milo still blabbering alot as ever.. .. hm.. go a bad newss for me.. me lost another fren. but this one, i cherishes alot..
his name is…. soul. if ppl know about him, sure will be shocked too. ..yes.. .. due to a unreasonable person, and some bloody stupidity,..
our frenship is gone. ..but.. zuan say he know in soul’s heart, me will still be his fren.
yeah.. it hurts.. i dunno if my sub conscious is trying to hide anything or what..
but.. when i first received that news,.. i was ok.. not feeling sad or anything.. but when something strikes, and i was in front of sam,.. lol.. ..oh well.. i just break down.. ..haiz… yeah.. dunno why.. cant hide in front of him. its like.. ..i dunno how to explain.. ..i think.. theres alot in me im keeping hem underwrapped. sigh.. tch… i wonder.. if me never cry in fron of him,.. would i’ve been hiding these feelings inside of me unawarely of?.. till im like.. ..getting ’sick’?
even zuan misses him too.. ..i miss soul alot.. .. sigh. .he’s really one of those few frens i could talk alot with. and i mean alot. with him ard, theres not a single long moment of silence.. … we shall see how future goes.. .. haiz..just really pity him.. .. gotta handle such a bloody girl out there…
…sigh.. oh well.. ..what to do. whats been done been done. .. heart still.. feels abit weird.. but. … well.. .. will get over it i hope. ..
hm.. well… been really sleepy like mad for the past few days.. so glad my off days starts now. its 5 days.. but lemme tell ya. its gonna feel like sooo short!!
sigh.. .. tch.. .. all i want to do on my leave.. ..i wanna relax.. be HAPPY.. thats very important.. hm.. just.. do whatever i wanna do.. ..then. ..hm.. oh well…
ah!!!!!!!! feel like kicking something.. or just screaming out loud.. .. its stressful man! oh yeah. .the night i cried out in font of sam, gosh! i was soooo stressful!! i can literally feel the stress inside of me! i could hardly resists my urge to punch at the big basket.. the skin on my finger peel off. but nah. no blood.. im fine. sigh.. dunno ar.. .. that nght so particularly stress.. .. i should. …learn how not to keep things inside of me eh?
alot of things to learn. but.. now im thinking of a bigger plan. in the next few months time.. .. hm.. see how everything goes ba..
gonna settle next week’s stuffs.. ..hm.. wonder how. .hahaha.
hm.. … ….. sigh…
duno why. … been feeling abit weird these past few days.. .. like soemthing aint right.. but could it be me thinking too much?.. ..hm..
jaa, mata
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