Deep Thoughts Blog

was so hot.. did not slpt well.. =/ plsu worried about roach
haiz.

long story. for today,

my right hadn..arm is aching badly =( i rrly need slp and rest.
since hes'; workig till late tmr, i wonder if i should finish my shift late too. gonna be super tired. anyway..
mm.... o well.
see wat my sm paln ba

so tired. =/

now im feeling hungry. btu. din had any dinner. throuout my life im not used to 3 meals a day kinda lifestyle.
unless sammy is there. then im liek. opk. im willing to eat with him.. etc
but yea. i  cant now. break fast sm treat. so full. soon after, not hungry, but time for lunch=( so need to eat. haiz. then yea. plus coffee, drinks, water,... omg.
uh huh. i cant take any dinner liao =/
hungry now. so wish can pull sammy down to eat my fav mee kuah =( sighs

bear with it and slp ba.

aw. so sad. finally r pat appeared on tv. he din said anything abt tat bit** kristen stewart. . but . i dunno. its just a feeling. .its like. .he's happy..and smiling.. but... beneathe all that, i sense ...sadnesss... like. recovered.. but not quiet at all.. .=/ liek. .forcing himself... like. .. acting happy.. cos he's on tv. i dunno .he seems. .abit fragile. .and .. not that. .usuall loking fa ce of his.. mm... yea...
i dunno . maybe im totally wrong. but u know. tat period of time.. .tats how i live on. cried on shop floor, till i learned how to control abit.. till cry during break time.. at home..at night whilst slping.. in bath.. then shop floor.. act happy.. smiel.. joke... do ur best to ur customer.. .
yea.. but .. lie i said. maybe he's getting better. maybe i was wrong . but .. i dunno. after all, the woman who betrayed him was the one he wanted to spend his life with. close to propose, and a man who grew up beliving true love due to his parents influence.
yea. ive totally changed my opnions of him. no longer dislike him. gonna support him now. unless!!! if he decided to patch thigns up with tat kristen. =.= then meaning he's stupid, then yea.
but.. uh huh. a man who drinks when he's happy. no no longer drin at all and he's left dead sober cos of her. healing his broken heart at home instead of out partying all night.. i think. yea. he rrly gained my support.
hope he'll get through this one day. .liek. .totally.. haiz...
he's a good man..

so yea. accoring to newspaper i read today whilst in train, cos of t ara abused news, more news are out. alot of korean groups are not getting along well behind the scenes. shinee, anything not happy withm will have cold war with each other. mm. another super  popular one... very long alreayd.. ... omg. suddenly i cant rememebr their name=X but yea.. i was shocked. cos that group name ..popular ba.. and it was way before shinee was out. they  too. will pick a fight and cold wars over little tiny bit of things. =X
dunno if tats true. but.... ....i think it is. jsut a feelign thats all. hope tvyxq isnt . anyway just two of them haha. nah. i believe they are brotherly love=)

anwyay,.... yea.. .tat girl.. so poor hting. saw her images..news.. how other team members ignored her, poke her eyes purposely in tv.. say scartics remarks about her.. in tv! and purposely dun hug her in tv live concert.. ....and otehr live show.. purposely neglet her... again. i cant say ohhh 100% true. but i believe so. but i wont say 1--%. cos im not lie a fan or whatsoever. but those images are so real.. and videos.. i felt it. i duno. it sliek. from me since young.. wu knwo. shy girl. = /. .sighs. sometimes v isolated .. then other classmates.. u knwo... =/... can be very irritating . or those popular ones... v.. proud.. or.. ovelry confident. .then when i started work in here... i ried to be very profeessional. rule 1 means 1.  then causing other memebrs dislike me or wat. .. cos i was too strict. left alone at one side of store while they chatted happily away.. chat with me also very.. like. .not close.. .
sighs. tat was a very togh and sad period for me. but. u know. i rrly like this job. tats why i stay on. i clenched my teeth and i held on. even when they say bad thigns behind my back, and with rgm siding with htem. very sad .=( but i held on.
tat isolated feeling.. is something... .inde'scrible. especially for a shy or quiet girl lie me. but now i learn to open up and smile or laugh whenveer i can. even if sad. i still need to put on a false front yea.
but anyway...
yea. i sympathise wiht her. that korean group girl.
rrly sad. like. the otehr bimbo girls in that group gang up against her. taling to one another but not to her. =/
i .. sighs. i dunno. i just. .wonde rhow she felt. cos. .she belog part of a super star group after all. dunno if she s in that mv mister. (like i said.. i dunno how they look liek they all look the sam e=.= same face and features.). but.. ..o well.....
duno wat happen now. heard shes forced to write apologises twit. even the other members bullied her via thei tweet. all from internet k. cos i dun hav twitter acctount.
so yea

its.. .sad. saddening =/ sighs..............
so yea. =/
all hte best to her ba.

thats why.... (though not becos of her).. me and  my melb sm.. yanika.
we both think the same way. too many gf, not gd. and we dun rrly like. cos they back stab, gossips, jealous, envy.. all these. .omg. very frightening =( or even steal ur bf. =/
stuffs liek tat. destroy ur frendship with one another, or with ur bf .
cos of jealousy or wat.
but for me, i still hav some gf. but not say super close where i can tell all my probs to.
theres oen. but not super everydya chat thype of close fren. cos no time meet up. but at leats. i trust her. i do.  (yea. .trust is a scary word..=/ _)
but. .not every thign im comfortable to tell her with. so yea.
somemore shes busy. other than that. ..i dun htink theres any gf im close with to tlak about personal probs.

so yea... some females.. typical ones. .very good at pretending. being popular, innocent, hot, or anything. but beneath those outer appearence,(liek the girls in t ara ..if tta news is 100% true)... there lies such ugly evil heart..... i .. .i rrly felt asham,ed of the females. =/ perhaps guys too? but wlel. im tlaking abou tmy own species here for now ba. so yea.
its scary . u cant tell  those type of bit****.. wat theyre thinking. . or planning soemthing in the dark... or to destroy u... or spread a rumour or something.. .to destroy u. very scheming.
haiz...... =(
but yea wat to do.. .
atst life. all sorts of ppl fo ru.

gdluck with the females. i can say for sure . .i am 100% good hearted. not to brad or wat. but im proud to be who i am,.
and not part of those **tches nowadays they turn out to be.
sop eya.
hoep u  guys out there. ..will find someone  with a pure heart. do not ever find someone who acted sweet in forn tof tv ,fans, or others... then deep beneath that soul, is osmen with an UGLY HEART.
ugly heart.. ..will not make someone pretty no matter how she may lok like megan fox, angeline jolie.. or whoever .

my deep felt blogtonight eh..

GOSH IM STARVING=XXXX

no choice. i rrly need to slp and rest huuuu =(

kk. bear with my hunger

jaa mata....

news whether true or not, fact is still the same... being pretencious will not get u far. .sooner or later, ppl can tell and see that u have an ugly heart to begin with....-