my hateful life =(

ha.. sianz.. =/ 2nd post of the day.
today kept crying non stop whole day. pms or what eh.
i hate it. freaking hate this feeling to the core.
n just when u need somebody to talk with, bloody internet finds trouble. dunno his internet or whos internet. ha. what a great timing.
..for that one moment a tleast i was fine. =/ then everything gets quiet.
sighs. .anyway, dunno how to stop crying now.
feels terrible. like. .everythign just came onto me. like thrown right at me.
sighs. ='(
***k whast wrong with me today. where got anyone cry the whole day . am i too stress out. or was it soemthing else? my tears cant stop flowing. n im down in the ood right now =(( sighs.. .terrible feeling. wtf is this.
too tired? stressed out? heartache? loliness or waht.
sighs. even when i was screaming, no one seem to care.
stupid bug.
o well. just have to kill it myself.
sometimes i wonder. if one day i met with a mishap, will i still be invisible to everyone else.
i just need alot of love right now. and i totally hate my life so much.
i cant stand my life liek this. ive got like.. 2 montsh plus to go. how am i gonna get through this shit?
think im just abit stress out n alot of tired out. but i have to keep moving. no holidays nor rest till after xmas. the frightening period starts from now alreayd. or should i say november onwards its even more hideous.
its absolutely crazy busy tiring stressful and.. .jus tires you out as easy as that.
its.. .crazy. especially when you're working at the town area. now imagine this. this year.. the xmas crowds gonna be like.. 300 percent more. than last year. yes u heard me right. ...
sighs... its good to be busy. but...
 sighs. all i want is to talk. at least that wouldve made my night better.
ha.. ...o well.................. not meant to be ba.. ...

...

i wish to stop crying now.
god. .i hate my life so much.  i don want this life anymore. take it all back. i dont want it.
will you ever give me back the kind of happiness that once saved my life?
i wish i have someone to talk to right now. ='(((( sighs.
so much pain.. but where do these all gone.
i looked at my scars... those scars.. were to remind me the pains i went through.
and how foolish i was to hurt myself. not serious hurt but yea.
i look at htem time to time.. i wonder why.
but.. i never found the answer. it remains a mystery to me. ...
in what ways it helped.. i dunno.. but.. at least kidna distract n put me to slp ..
pains. .are such a pain in the ass.
.. o well.
i hate my life to the core. but hopefully you love yours. ...
always have that someone u love right beside u k.

..my eyes.. so swollen from all those cryings..... tmr. .how am i gonna face my rgm... ..

...mata