Prelude to a possible death

ha. my heart fucking hurt today. anjd so on. keep on feeling like crying.
...fucking suck. everythign just fucked up .just sucks big time.
totally just.. wonder wheere i stand right now.
ha. just so fucked up. i duno me anymore.
still hate all the slps im getting. sucks.
oh yea. i did said that... everything sucks yea? oh yea. uh huh
sighs.. heart totally just feel like.. jumping out. just wanan stab a knife right through the fucking flesh.
bah. whatever ne. ... nothing matters anymroe anyway. whats there for me to think of.
fuck
hate this word. but . .well, ppl changed right. whatever. just in a totally fucked up shitty mood now.
huh? no. its been liek this ever since... when? ..erm.. .lets see... .since i had my heart cut off? yea. thats tie time.  been doing my best to get over it. but i duno. still tryingman. =/
these couple of days been the worse so far. todya the super worst. and glad its my off. .. sighs.
..bro is flying off midnight.. i mean early mrg. gonna left me just alone at home now .=(/ sighs.
sianz.. no mood to type anything. i hope i'll feel better soon. i dun.. i mena i cant seem to remember how happiness feels like naymore. i rrly cant =( 
o well.
hell goes on everydya.
wahtelse.. well.. nothing much to talk about ba.. feel liek doing some changes to myself.. i duno where to begin .very lazy to start. ..but ynea. .perhaps it could be a good thing. i duno. its itme to do something. otherwise if i remind like htis, i'll die.
mata